Quote

Cain understands domestic issues because he had experience selling pizza and he understands international issues because pizza is Italian.

Stephen Colbert

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Stephen Colbert
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: May 13
Actor
Comedian
Satirist
Screenwriter
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Washington
District of Columbia
Stephen Tyrone Colbert
Experience
Cain
Pizza
Domestic
Understands
Italian
Selling
International
Issues

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If you are a hermaphrodite, it is physically impossible to be gay.
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I'm a huge news junkie. I love what the news does.
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I love the Internet, and the Internet loves me back. Why else would it offer me so much sex?
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I believe that the government that governs best is a government that governs least, and by these standards we have set up a fabulous government in Iraq.
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My mom kind of led me toward acting. She wanted to be an actress when she was younger. That made me interested in it when I was a kid, because she and I are very close.
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The beauty of new media is that no evidence is necessary. The brave blog-troopers have stormed the cockpit of news, and wrestled the joystick of authority away from the seasoned pilots of the press who would land our country at the Facts International Airport.
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I'm more American than apple pie. I'm like apple pie, with a hot dog in it.
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We all deserve credit for this new surveillance state that we live in because we the people voted for the Patriot Act. Democrats and Republicans alike....We voted for the people who voted for it, and then voted for the people who reauthorized it, then voted for the people who re-re-authorize d it.
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Yes, Dr. King is pro-gun just as surely as Jesus would be pro-nails.
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I don't like the new president who hunts muslim extremists, I like the old president who is a muslim extremist.
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Atheism, a religion dedicated to its own sense of smug superiority.
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Corporations have free speech, but they can't speak like you and me. They don't have mouths or hands.
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I have always been a fan of reality by majority vote.
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There's nothing wrong with being gay. I have plenty of friends who are going to hell.
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