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Other people's deconstruction of your motivations doesn't help you do what you do. You can't swallow and think about swallowing at the same time.

Stephen Colbert

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Stephen Colbert
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: May 13
Actor
Comedian
Satirist
Screenwriter
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Washington
District of Columbia
Stephen Tyrone Colbert
Time
Deconstruction
Think
Motivations
Thinking
Swallowing
People
Swallow
Motivation
Help
Helping
Doesn

More quotes by Stephen Colbert

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If you are a hermaphrodite, it is physically impossible to be gay.
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I am no fan of books.
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It would be a very short pint. It would be gummy bears and matzah, and be called Chewy Jewy.
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The way to a man's heart is through his stomach...just make sure you thrust upward through his ribcage.
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Agnostics are just atheists without balls.
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I could sit toe to toe at a potato table with anybody.
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There's nothing wrong with being gay. I have plenty of friends who are going to hell.
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Women don't want all that. Women just want a partner who is considerate and attentive, who will spoon with them while reciting Keats, and feed them organic yogurt by candlelight on a seaside cliff at sunset.
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I must confess that I've never trusted the Web. I've always seen it as a coward's tool. Where does it live? How do you hold it personally responsible? Can you put a distributed network of fiber-optic cable on notice? And is it male or female? In other words, can I challenge it to a fight?
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Pain is the body's way of telling the brain it's in trouble. Similarly, confusion is the brain's way of telling the body, 'All right, buddy, drop that book.
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Thinking that other people might be better than you is what makes you Canadian, not American.
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First, [in high school], I smoked a lot of pot...and that's how I got to know the people 'half in' the society of my high school and we waved at each other over the bong. Then I got to know people by making jokes.
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Wikipedia is the first place I go when I'm looking for knowledge... or when I want to create some.
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Cameras are dangerous. With no waiting period or background check, any whack-job could just stroll into a Wal-Mart and walk out with a semi-automatic. Now, for years I've been pressing for stricter regulations on cameras, especially around our elected officials. Too many political lives have been cut short by some crazed shooter.
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My grandfather did not travel across 4,000 miles of the Atlantic Ocean to see this country overrun by immigrants. He did it because he killed a man back in Ireland.
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I used to write things for friends. There was this girl I had a crush on, and she had a teacher she didn't like at school. I had a real crush on her, so almost every day I would write her a little short story where she would kill him in a different way.
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Yes, President Romney will not take God off our coins. And that is so important because right now, just like God, the value of our currency really has to be taken on faith.
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I believe Sarah Palin is a true statesman, whose experience as a failed vice presidential candidate, half-term governor and eight-episode reality star has fully prepared her to take control of our nuclear arsenal.
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Not living in fear is a great gift, because certainly these days we do it so much. And do you know what I like about comedy? You can't laugh and be afraid at the same time - of anything. If you're laughing, I defy you to be afraid.
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I just think Rosa Parks was overrated. Last time I checked, she got famous for breaking the law.
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