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If we raise taxes on corporations, what incentive will they have to make money other than the fact that it's the sole reason they exist.

Stephen Colbert

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Stephen Colbert
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: May 13
Actor
Comedian
Satirist
Screenwriter
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Washington
District of Columbia
Stephen Tyrone Colbert
Money
Sole
Reason
Corporations
Make
Raise
Raises
Taxes
Exist
Fact
Incentive
Facts
Incentives

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I love the Internet, and the Internet loves me back. Why else would it offer me so much sex?
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Once I'm performing the show, I think that hour show has a certain intimacy with our audience. And that intimacy is through the lens and the live audience is a witness to that, whereas the audience at home is actually the object of my efforts.
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You CAN make an omelette without breaking eggs. It's just a really bad omelette.
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Clearly, America has no shortage of metaphorical opportunities for the poor.
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We have this idea in our mind that there's a separation of church and state in America, which I think is a good thing. And we extend that to our politics. Like it's not just church and state, but it's also there's a separation of religion and politics. But of course, there - there isn't.
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I used to write things for friends. There was this girl I had a crush on, and she had a teacher she didn't like at school. I had a real crush on her, so almost every day I would write her a little short story where she would kill him in a different way.
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I'm getting angry at liberals.
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I'm a satirist, so I've got boxing gloves on if the person is worthy of satire. But I'm not an assassin.
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Marijuana is a gateway drug that can lead to awful things, like Phish getting back together.
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Of course! Jeb Bush! America is hungry for another leader from that talented family!
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Take the platypus - that is not a finished product. It is clearly still in beta.
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Don't be bitter. Everybody suffers. If you can accept your suffering then you will understand other people better. Be grateful for pain. Love life.
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Atheism, a religion dedicated to its own sense of smug superiority.
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