Quote

First, [in high school], I smoked a lot of pot...and that's how I got to know the people 'half in' the society of my high school and we waved at each other over the bong. Then I got to know people by making jokes.

Stephen Colbert

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Stephen Colbert
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: May 13
Actor
Comedian
Satirist
Screenwriter
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Washington
District of Columbia
Stephen Tyrone Colbert
Half
Bongs
Making
Waved
School
Smoked
Firsts
Pot
First
Weed
People
Jokes
High
Society
Bong

More quotes by Stephen Colbert

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I just think Rosa Parks was overrated. Last time I checked, she got famous for breaking the law.
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Yesterday in a 25 to 24 vote, Republicans welcomed back Lott back into their leadership and named him minority whip. That is great for Trent. They say minority whip is a stepping stone to Grand Wizard.
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When my car runs out of gas, I buy a new one. I don't want to ride around with a quitter.
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I am no fan of books.
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As we all know, reality has a liberal bias.
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It's hard to swallow your pride. That's why I slather mine in mayonnaise.
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Liberals want to burn the flag, but progressives just want to microwave it?
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Like all great theologies, Bill [O'Reilly]'s can be boiled down to one sentence: There must be a god, because I don't know how things work.
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As Shakespeare said, there's nothin' cooler than droppin' the 'g's off of gerunds!
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Donald Trump is a strong president. We got to stand behind this guy is what I think.
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When meeting royalty, it is very important, no matter how excited you are, not to vomit on them. Instead, vomit on the nearest commoner.
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I believe that the government that governs best is a government that governs least, and by these standards we have set up a fabulous government in Iraq.
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I'm obviously younger, much better looking [then Jeorge W.Bush].He didn't veto things, he didn't bring order and fiscal restraint.
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I suppose fear is like a drug. A little bit isn't that bad, but you can get addicted to the consumption and distribution of it.
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I don't like books, they're all fact, no heart.
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If Corporations are people, I guarantee you that a government of those people, by those people, and for those people will continue to exist.
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My brother Billy was the joke teller. My brother Jim had a really sharp, cutting wit. And the teller of long stories, that was my brother Ed. As a child, I just absorbed everything they said, and I was always in competition for the laughs.
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But you are also the biggest threat of all ...You are a gay person I like. Your threat is that you make being gay seem non-threatening. It's almost as if your happiness does not take mine away.
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Pissing off PETA is as easy as pie. Delicious kitten pie.
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Sir, pay no attention to the people who say the glass is half empty, because 32% means it's 2/3 empty. There's still some liquid in that glass is my point, but I wouldn't drink it. The last third is usually backwash. (Said to President Bush at the White House Correspondents Dinner)
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