Quote

In God's eyes all children are beautiful but here on earth we have higher standards.

Stephen Colbert

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Stephen Colbert
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: May 13
Actor
Comedian
Satirist
Screenwriter
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Washington
District of Columbia
Stephen Tyrone Colbert
Eyes
Eye
Beautiful
Earth
Children
Standards
Higher

More quotes by Stephen Colbert

Image
New study reveals men like to cuddle. Another study reveals men will say anything to get into bed with a woman.
Stephen Colbert
Image
No one has any idea what's going to happen. Not even Elon Musk. That's why he's building those rockets. He wants a 'Plan B' on another world.
Stephen Colbert
Image
If I had one wish, it would be for self-drying pants. Wait -- no! Unlimited wishes! How do I return these stupid pants?!
Stephen Colbert
Image
Of course! Jeb Bush! America is hungry for another leader from that talented family!
Stephen Colbert
Image
Writing and producing the show is an intellectual process. Performing the show is far more athletic and intuitive, because you don't get to do it twice. It helps if you've done whatever the old saw is, 10,000 hours of it. Because I've done 10,000 hours of comedy, I have this database in my mind of what works and what doesn't work.
Stephen Colbert
Image
Baby carrots are making me gay.
Stephen Colbert
Image
I deliver my Truth hot and hard.
Stephen Colbert
Image
Now, for my younger viewers out there, a book is something we used to have before the internet. It’s sort of a blog for people with attention spans.
Stephen Colbert
Image
If I had a dime for everytime that I was wrong, I'd be broke.
Stephen Colbert
Image
If a poor family falls on hard times in the woods, and no one is around to care, did it really happen?
Stephen Colbert
Image
Thankfully, dreams can change. If we'd all stuck with our first dream, the world would be overrun with cowboys and princesses.
Stephen Colbert
Image
Everybody loves dogs. They're the pizza of the animal kingdom.
Stephen Colbert
Image
The lead singer of Creed says he won’t endorse President Obama. Well that settles it -- Obama will not win the 1998 presidential election.
Stephen Colbert
Image
The beauty of new media is that no evidence is necessary. The brave blog-troopers have stormed the cockpit of news, and wrestled the joystick of authority away from the seasoned pilots of the press who would land our country at the Facts International Airport.
Stephen Colbert
Image
I am no fan of books. And chances are, if you're reading this, you and I share a healthy skepticism about the printed word. Well, I want you to know that this is the first book I've ever written, and I hope it's the first book you've ever read. Don't make a habit of it.
Stephen Colbert
Image
I could sit toe to toe at a potato table with anybody.
Stephen Colbert
Image
Charles Darwin got totally hammered, woke up next to a monkey and decided he had to come up with a theory to make it all okay.
Stephen Colbert
Image
The liberal Gluten-free agenda is turning our dogs lesbian.
Stephen Colbert
Image
Hey, single malt scotch, youre thirty years old. When are you going to settle down and get married to my stomach?
Stephen Colbert
Image
The pen is mightier than the sword, if you shoot that pen out of a gun
Stephen Colbert