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In the human race today, you came last.
Spike Milligan
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Spike Milligan
Age: 83 †
Born: 1918
Born: April 16
Died: 2002
Died: February 27
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Journalist
Musician
Poet
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Writer
Terence Alan Patrick Seán Milligan
Terence Alan Milligan
Terence Alan Patrick Sean Milligan
Last
Today
Human
Humans
Came
Race
Lasts
More quotes by Spike Milligan
Any man can be 62, but it takes a bus to be 62A.
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Policemen are numbered in case they get lost.
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Is there anything worn under the kilt? No, it's all in perfect working order.
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I'm a hero with coward's legs.
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Are you going to come quietly, or do I have to use earplugs?
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A bird in The Strand is worth two in Shepherds Bush
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I spent many years laughing at Harry Secombe's singing until somebody told me that it wasn't a joke.
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A lot of learning canbe a little thing.
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I cannot stand being awake, the pain is too much.
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Life is a long agonized illness only curable by death.
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Money can't buy friends, but you can get a better class of enemy.
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We haven't got a plan so nothing can go wrong!
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Said Hamlet to Ophelia, I'll draw a sketch of thee. What kind of pencil shall I use? 2B or not 2B?
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The most difficult book I have ever read was a manual on the use of iron bangles by A.J. Thompson.
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All I ask is the chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
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I shook hands with a friendly Arab. I still have my right arm to prove it.
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In India a farmhand was caught in the act with his cow. He said he had bad eyesight and thought it was his wife.
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Money can't buy you happiness but it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery.
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How long was I in the army? Five foot eleven.
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Never return to a doctor whose office plants have died. After five days in hospital, I took a turn for the nurse.
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