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In the human race today, you came last.
Spike Milligan
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Spike Milligan
Age: 83 †
Born: 1918
Born: April 16
Died: 2002
Died: February 27
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Journalist
Musician
Poet
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Writer
Terence Alan Patrick Seán Milligan
Terence Alan Milligan
Terence Alan Patrick Sean Milligan
Came
Race
Lasts
Last
Today
Human
Humans
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Any man can be 62, but it takes a bus to be 62A.
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All I ask is the chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
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Never return to a doctor whose office plants have died. After five days in hospital, I took a turn for the nurse.
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If I don't eat soon, I'll die of hunger and if I die, I won't eat soon.
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Many people die of thirst but the Irish are born with one.
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Its all in the mind, you know.
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I thought I'd begin by reading a poem by Shakespeare, but then I thought, why should I? He never reads any of mine.
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How long was I in the army? Five foot eleven.
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Money can't buy you happiness but it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery.
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A sure cure for seasickness is to sit under a tree.
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In India a farmhand was caught in the act with his cow. He said he had bad eyesight and thought it was his wife.
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Chopsticks are one of the reasons the Chinese never invented custard.
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If a robin redbreast in a cage Puts all heaven in a rage, How feels heaven when Dies the billionth battery hen?
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I'm a hero with coward's legs.
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My father confused me. From the ages of one to seven, I thought my name was Jesus Christ!
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My Father had a profound influence on me. He was a lunatic.
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