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I told you I was ill. (On his headstone)
Spike Milligan
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Spike Milligan
Age: 83 †
Born: 1918
Born: April 16
Died: 2002
Died: February 27
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Journalist
Musician
Poet
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Writer
Terence Alan Patrick Seán Milligan
Terence Alan Milligan
Terence Alan Patrick Sean Milligan
Headstone
Ill
Told
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I can speak Esperanto like a native.
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Is there anything worn under the kilt? No, it's all in perfect working order.
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I'm a hero with coward's legs.
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Any man can be 62, but it takes a bus to be 62A.
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Money can't buy you happiness but it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery.
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Said Hamlet to Ophelia, I'll draw a sketch of thee. What kind of pencil shall I use? 2B or not 2B?
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A sure cure for seasickness is to sit under a tree.
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Life is a long agonized illness only curable by death.
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How long was I in the army? Five foot eleven.
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If I don't eat soon, I'll die of hunger and if I die, I won't eat soon.
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We haven't got a plan so nothing can go wrong!
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Chopsticks are one of the reasons the Chinese never invented custard.
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God made nightButMan made darkness.
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Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, get it out with Optrex.
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I thought I'd begin by reading a poem by Shakespeare, but then I thought, why should I? He never reads any of mine.
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The most difficult book I have ever read was a manual on the use of iron bangles by A.J. Thompson.
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I shook hands with a friendly Arab. I still have my right arm to prove it.
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My father confused me. From the ages of one to seven, I thought my name was Jesus Christ!
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A lot of learning canbe a little thing.
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