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I thought I'd begin by reading a poem by Shakespeare, but then I thought, why should I? He never reads any of mine.
Spike Milligan
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Spike Milligan
Age: 83 †
Born: 1918
Born: April 16
Died: 2002
Died: February 27
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Journalist
Musician
Poet
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Writer
Terence Alan Patrick Seán Milligan
Terence Alan Milligan
Terence Alan Patrick Sean Milligan
Thought
Sonnet
Never
Reads
Shakespeare
Poem
Mines
Mine
Begin
Reading
More quotes by Spike Milligan
Many people die of thirst but the Irish are born with one.
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Never return to a doctor whose office plants have died. After five days in hospital, I took a turn for the nurse.
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Is there anything worn under the kilt? No, it's all in perfect working order.
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Any man can be 62, but it takes a bus to be 62A.
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If you kill me, I promise you - you will never take me alive.
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A sure cure for seasickness is to sit under a tree.
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My Father had a profound influence on me. He was a lunatic.
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Money can't buy you happiness but it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery.
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My father confused me. From the ages of one to seven, I thought my name was Jesus Christ!
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Money can't buy friends, but you can get a better class of enemy.
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All I ask is the chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
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In India a farmhand was caught in the act with his cow. He said he had bad eyesight and thought it was his wife.
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Its all in the mind, you know.
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I spent many years laughing at Harry Secombe's singing until somebody told me that it wasn't a joke.
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Life is a long agonized illness only curable by death.
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I can speak Esperanto like a native.
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Chopsticks are one of the reasons the Chinese never invented custard.
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The most difficult book I have ever read was a manual on the use of iron bangles by A.J. Thompson.
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