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I was compiling a list in my head titled 'Reasons to Get Up: You Don't Have to Leave, but You Can't Pee Here.

Sloane Crosley

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Sloane Crosley
Age: 46
Born: 1978
Born: August 3
Essayist
Journalist
Novelist
Writer
New York City
New York
List
Lists
Reasons
Leave
Head
Reason
Titled

More quotes by Sloane Crosley

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I would gladly have accepted a heaping spoonful of nepotism when I got out of college and was looking for a job.
Sloane Crosley
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The search for one's first professional job is not unlike a magical love potion: when one wants to fall in love with the next thing one sees, one generally does.
Sloane Crosley
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I have come to understand myself as more of a New York writer, or more of a woman writer, but I don't feel like that while I'm writing. But I think that most New Yorkers would object to calling me a New Yorker. I didn't grow up here.
Sloane Crosley
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My mother is a special education teacher but also an artist, and my father an advertising executive. They are about as wacky as you can get without being alcoholics.
Sloane Crosley
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I think the rule of thumb should be this: if you preface a sentence about a friend with the phrase, 'I love X, but... ' more than once in any conversation, you should stop hanging out with them.
Sloane Crosley
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If you have to ask someone to change, to tell you they love you, to bring wine to dinner, to call you when they land, you can't afford to be with them.
Sloane Crosley
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Let me put it this way: I don't feel as settled as I look. I think that's true of everyone, probably. Except for Beyonce and Jay-Z. I don't think they wake up and think, 'Ugh, when's it going to work out for us? Why can't we catch a break?' Aside from them, I'm pretty sure everyone's life feels a lot less intentional.
Sloane Crosley
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In New York and LA, there is sort of that silent competition to be on the cutting edge of something.
Sloane Crosley
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For me, nothing brings out my 'born yesterday' idiotic qualities quite like having my photograph taken.
Sloane Crosley
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Kids across the country have grown up accepting the idea that no one can harm your family if at least one of its adult members is in the shower. No one knows why.
Sloane Crosley
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Unless we're talking about old-school, witchcraft-trial violence, can we please phase out the phrase 'girl crush?' While we're at it, if we can axe 'like, total girl crush' unless Total Girl Crush is the name of a fizzy soft drink, in which case I'll take two, thank you.
Sloane Crosley
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As most doctors will tell you, cleansing is ridiculous. You know what's been around longer than that state-of-the-art juicer? Your kidneys. And your liver. Still, the cleanse has recalibrated my definition of a splurge.
Sloane Crosley
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I think that most New Yorkers would object to calling me a New Yorker. I didn't grow up here.
Sloane Crosley
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We've come to expect so little from online privacy measures that public displays of concern about the matter are more or less for show. Being devastated to discover you've been tagged in somebody else's photo has an air of the melodramatic about it at this point.
Sloane Crosley
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There's just no concept of layering a thick-sleeved sweater under a coat in L.A. A coat is more of a gesture than a necessity. You know, in case the temperature goes down to 55 degrees.
Sloane Crosley
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Are there moments when I see unrequited crushes or ex-boyfriends slow dancing with their dates and kind of want to stab myself in the spleen with a salad fork? Yeah, sure.
Sloane Crosley
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I write on weekends, on vacation, and, really - on deadline and on my floor. Both terrible for the back.
Sloane Crosley
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I don't really think of my essays as being about myself. I know it sounds insane, but I just don't think of them as a memoir. They're essays they're not an autobiography.
Sloane Crosley
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I am starting to like LA, but the concept of a place you have to get used to so much seems a little weird to me. I have been to many foreign cities where I didn't have do acclimatize as much as I did to LA
Sloane Crosley
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Sometimes we don't know what we want until we don't get it.
Sloane Crosley