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I think the rule of thumb should be this: if you preface a sentence about a friend with the phrase, 'I love X, but... ' more than once in any conversation, you should stop hanging out with them.
Sloane Crosley
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Sloane Crosley
Age: 46
Born: 1978
Born: August 3
Essayist
Journalist
Novelist
Writer
New York City
New York
Sentences
Preface
Rule
Thumb
Conversation
Refreshing
Friend
Thumbs
Stop
Phrase
Love
Hanging
Think
Sentence
Thinking
Phrases
More quotes by Sloane Crosley
I was compiling a list in my head titled 'Reasons to Get Up: You Don't Have to Leave, but You Can't Pee Here.
Sloane Crosley
I was surprised by how much I loved Portland. It is so wonderfully creative without being artsy. Great food scene.
Sloane Crosley
When I was nine years old, I wrote a short story called 'How to Build a Snowman,' from which no practical snowperson-crafting techniques could be gleaned. The story was an assignment for class and it featured a series of careful but meaningless instructions. Of course, the building of the snowman was a red herring.
Sloane Crosley
When you spin a globe and point to a city and actually go to that city, you build an allowance of missed opportunities on the back end.
Sloane Crosley
My mother is a special education teacher but also an artist, and my father an advertising executive. They are about as wacky as you can get without being alcoholics.
Sloane Crosley
It is my belief that people who speak of high school with a sugary fondness are bluffing away early-onset Alzheimer's.
Sloane Crosley
I think it's hard to have a full-time job and write fiction, but for essays, you need to be in the world.
Sloane Crosley
and there's something about having an especially different name that makes it difficult to imagine what you would be like as a Jennifer.
Sloane Crosley
Every day of my adult life, I have worn at least one piece of jewelry from my maternal grandmother's collection, all of which were manufactured by famed Danish silversmith Georg Jensen. To the naked eye, I am either a Jensen loyalist or a grandmother loyalist. Really I am just a Pretty Things loyalist.
Sloane Crosley
I would gladly have accepted a heaping spoonful of nepotism when I got out of college and was looking for a job.
Sloane Crosley
There's an 'Everything must go!' emotional liquidation feel to the end of your twenties, isn't there? What will happen if we turn thirty and we're not 'ready?' You don't feel entirely settled in any aspect of your life, even if you are on paper.
Sloane Crosley
Book tours are such a little tapas meal of where I could live.
Sloane Crosley
In New York, if you weigh under 200 pounds and decline so much as a cookie at a co-worker's party, women will flock to your side, assuring you of your appealing physique. This is how skittish we are about the dangers of anorexia and the pressures of body image.
Sloane Crosley
It's remarkable the logic we'll build around a misapprehension.
Sloane Crosley
Are there moments when I see unrequited crushes or ex-boyfriends slow dancing with their dates and kind of want to stab myself in the spleen with a salad fork? Yeah, sure.
Sloane Crosley
Our brains are like bonsai trees, growing around our private versions of reality.
Sloane Crosley
You feel like telling him you're not single in the way that he thinks you're single. After all, you have yourself.
Sloane Crosley
We've come to expect so little from online privacy measures that public displays of concern about the matter are more or less for show. Being devastated to discover you've been tagged in somebody else's photo has an air of the melodramatic about it at this point.
Sloane Crosley
I think that most New Yorkers would object to calling me a New Yorker. I didn't grow up here.
Sloane Crosley
Let me put it this way: I don't feel as settled as I look. I think that's true of everyone, probably. Except for Beyonce and Jay-Z. I don't think they wake up and think, 'Ugh, when's it going to work out for us? Why can't we catch a break?' Aside from them, I'm pretty sure everyone's life feels a lot less intentional.
Sloane Crosley