Quote

We camouflage our true being before others to protect ourselves against criticism or rejection. This protection comes at a steep price... we are misunderstood. When we are misunderstood, especially by family and friends, we join the 'lonely crowd.' Worse... we tend to lose touch with our real selves.

Sidney Jourard

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Sidney Jourard
Age: 48 †
Born: 1926
Born: January 21
Died: 1974
Died: December 2
Psychologist
Sidney Marshall Jourard
Comes
Worse
Crowd
Others
Protect
Crowds
True
Especially
Protection
Camouflage
Self
Lose
Price
Steep
Real
Loses
Lonely
Selves
Understanding
Tend
Misunderstood
Friends
Criticism
Join
Family
Touch
Rejection

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Actualization of self cannot be sought as a goal in its own right. . . . Rather, it seems to be a by-product of active commitment of one's talents to some cause, outside the self, such as the quest for beauty, truth, or justice.
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We encourage people to believe that there is only one identity, one role, one way for them to be, one value for them to fulfill, rather than a host of possible 'incarnations' to be lived in a lifetime.
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The experience of surprise is a sign of one's readiness to grow.
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Paradoxically, we fail to disclose ourselves to other people because we want so much to be loved. Because we feel that way, we present ourselves as someone we think can be loved and accepted, and we conceal whatever would mar that image.
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You cannot collaborate with another person toward some common end unless you know him. How can you know him, and he you, unless you have engaged in enough mutual disclosure of self to be able anticipate how he will react and what part he will play?
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Amazement and wonder signify that one's concepts of self and of the world and of other people are ready to be re-formed.
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