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Gradually the feeling wears off, and I feel swamped again by the inexplicable pettiness of being alive.
Sebastian Faulks
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Sebastian Faulks
Age: 71
Born: 1953
Born: April 20
Broadcaster
Journalist
Novelist
Parodist
Writer
Sebastian Charles Faulks
Gradually
Alive
Feeling
Feelings
Feel
Swamped
Feels
Pettiness
Inexplicable
Wears
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Oh, the sweetness of giving in, of full surrender.
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They're so attached to their patterns that they've forgotten rule number one of human behavior: there are no patterns. People just do things. There's no such things as a coherent and fully integrated human personality, let alone consistent motivation.
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I don't like being rumbled, I like to be invisible.
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And sometimes in life, I imagine, good things do happen. Most of the time, it's the opposite, obviously. But I don't think you should rule out the possibility that just occasionally chance might deal you a good card.
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Inhale and hold the evening in your lungs.
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It was entirely silent and I tried to breathe its peace.
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I don't think you ever understand your life - not till it's finished and probably not then either. The more I live the less I seem to understand.
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I never for a moment considered killing myself, because it wouldn't have achieved anything.
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My direction? Anywhere. Because one is always nearer by not keeping still.
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Life can be lived at a remove. You trade in futures, and then you trade in derivatives of futures. Banks make more money trading derivatives than they do trading actual commodities.
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That's what opium does to suffering: makes it of hypothetical interest only.
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But I think if any song can touch the heart, then one should value it.
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Memory is the only thing that binds you to earlier selves for the rest, you become an entirely different being every decade or so, sloughing off the old persona, renewing and moving on. You are not who you were, he told her, nor who you will be.
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He wrote one more paragraph for his own sake, to see what he had to say.
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Why take drugs specifically designed to send you insane?
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. . . she read with undifferentiated glee . . .
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I want to be careful not to throw all this away. This is happiness. I think this is what happiness is. I haven't got it yet, but I can sense it out there. I feel I'm close to it. Some days, I'm so close I can almost smell it.
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