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Any man can fart in a closed room and say that he commands the wind

Scott Lynch

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Scott Lynch
Age: 46
Born: 1978
Born: April 2
Author
Novelist
Writer
St Paul
Minnesota
Men
Fart
Commands
Closed
Command
Room
Wind
Rooms

More quotes by Scott Lynch

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When you can't cheat the game, you'd best find a means to cheat the players.
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Nobody admires anyone else without qualification. If they do they're after an image, not a person.
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What kind of knife is this?” Locke held a rounded buttering utensil up for Chains’ inspection. “It’s all wrong. You couldn’t kill anyone with this.
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Worst of all, the inner vault is guarded by a live dragon, attended by fifty naked women armed with poisoned spears, each of them sworn to die in Requin's service. All redheads. -You're just making that up, Jean.
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My disinterest in your bullshit is so tangible you could make bricks out of it
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I think it’s fairly common for writers to be afflicted with two simultaneous yet contradictory delusions, the burning certainty that we’re unique geniuses, and the constant fear that we’re witless frauds who are speeding toward epic failure.
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Yeah, but if I don't start my nervous pacing now, I'll never have it all done in time.
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Are you smarter than a pig, Locke?” “On occasion,” said Locke. “There are contrary opinions.
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They kissed for the sort of endless moment that only exists between lovers whose lips are still new territory to one another.
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Only one way to win when you're being chased by someone bigger and tougher than you. Turn straight around, punch their teeth out, and hope the gods are fond of you.
Scott Lynch
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I'll wager I would have screwed things up regardless. But. . .can you imagine those poor bastards grappling their prey, leaping over the rails, swords in hand, screaming, 'Your cats! Give us all your gods-damned cats!
Scott Lynch
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If reassurances could dull pain, nobody would ever go to the trouble of pressing grapes.
Scott Lynch
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You're ten pints of crazy in a one-pint glass.
Scott Lynch
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When the sky’s falling, I take shelter under bullshit.
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As for history, we are living in its ruins. And as for biographies, we are living with the consequences of all the decisions ever made in them. I tend not to read them for pleasure. It’s not unlike carefully scrutinizing the map when one has already reached the destination.
Scott Lynch
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Cold walls do not a prison make, nor iron bands a bondsman.
Scott Lynch
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My name's Jean Tannen, and I'm the ambush.
Scott Lynch
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I think piracy is a bit like drinking. You want to stay out all night doing it, you pay the price the next day.
Scott Lynch
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There are only three people in life you can never fool--pawnbrokers, whores, and your mother. Since your mother's dead, I've taken her place. Hence, I'm bullshit-proof.
Scott Lynch
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To us — richer and cleverer than everyone else!
Scott Lynch