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As a fan, I'm distraught, but as a cartoonist looking at new vacant spaces in 2400 newspapers, well, behind me, my cats are dancing a conga line.

Scott Adams

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Scott Adams
Age: 67
Born: 1957
Born: June 8
Blogger
Comic Strip Creator
Comics Artist
Economist
Engineer
Journalist
Writer
Windham
New York
Scott Raymond Adams
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Newspapers
Looking
Cat
Conga
Space
Dancing
Congas
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Cats

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Decisions are made by people who have time, not people who have talent.
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I keep hearing the argument that some things are constitutional while other things are not. The idea is that we should be in favor of all the things that were decided over 200 years ago by a bunch of slave-owning cross-dressers who pooped in holes.
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Engineers like to solve problems. If there are no problems handily available, they will create their own problems.
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The most ineffective workers are systematically moved to the place where they can do the least damage: management.
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The best things in life are silly.
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Failure is where success likes to hide in plain sight.
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Your business clothes are naturally attracted to staining liquids. This attraction is strongest just before an important meeting.
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Every generation of humans believed it had all the answers it needed, except for a few mysteries they assumed would be solved at any moment. And they all believed their ancestors were simplistic and deluded. What are the odds that you are the first generation of humans who will understand reality ?
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The best part about being my age is in knowing how my life worked out.
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I hated my work. It never seemed to me to be what I should be doing.
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Reporters are faced with the daily choice of painstakingly researching stories or writing whatever people tell them. Both approaches pay the same.
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Dilbert: Evolution must be true because it is a logical conclusion of the scientific method. Dogbert: But science is based on the irrational belief that because we cannot perceive reality all at once, things called time and cause and effect exist. Dilbert: That's what I was taught and that's what I believe. Dogbert: Sounds cultish.
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If you’re going to create, create a lot. Creativity is not like playing the slot machines, where failure to win means you go home broke. With creativity, if you don’t win, you’re usually no worse off than if you hadn’t played.
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In yesterday's post, I asked how many of you guys would have sex with a robot if it was indistinguishable from a hot human woman. About 95% of the hetero guys said they would. The other 5% expressed a strong preference for lying.
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You can never underestimate the stupidity of the general public.
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I was busier than a beaver in a coffee lake.
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Scientists often invent words to fill the holes in their understanding.These words are meant as conveniences until real understanding can be found. ... Words such as dimension and field and infinity ... are not descriptions of reality, yet we accept them as such because everyone is sure someone else knows what the words mean.
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If you want to kill an idea without being identified as the assassin, suggest that the legal department take a look at it.
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The amount of energy spent laughing at a joke should be directly proportional to the hierarchical status of the joke teller.
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Work is like the rest of life. The best parts are free.
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