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Tell me what you need, and I'll tell you how to get along without it.

Scott Adams

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Scott Adams
Age: 67
Born: 1957
Born: June 8
Blogger
Comic Strip Creator
Comics Artist
Economist
Engineer
Journalist
Writer
Windham
New York
Scott Raymond Adams
Along
Wisdom
Tell
Without
Need
Needs

More quotes by Scott Adams

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Men live in a fantasy world. I know this because I am one, and I actually receive my mail there
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A rental car is basically an ashtray on wheels.
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You might think the word homemade is just a word we use as a marketing ploy. But what you don't realize is that the staff sleeps here at night. If your tablecloth is wrinkled, that's why.
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The best any human can do is to pick a delusion that helps him get through the day
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Every year, it takes more brains to navigate this complicated world. More people are falling below what I call the 'incompetence line' through no fault of their own.
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If I liked food and disliked exercise as much as a 400 pound guy, I'd be a 400 pound guy.
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I'm curious how you'll know it works. I assume it's mostly a cosmetic change.
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Normal people... believe that if it ain't broke, don't fix it. Engineers believe that if it ain't broke, it doesn't have enough features yet.
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The best things in life are silly.
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Dogbert gazing at night sky No matter how bad the day is, the stars are always there. Dilbert Actually, many of them burned out years ago, but their light is just now reaching earth. DogbertThank you for shattering my comfortable misconception. DilbertIt's the miracle of science.
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Man is a game playing animal and a computer is another way to play games.
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The source of all unhappiness is other people. As soon as you learn to think of other people as noisy furniture, the sooner you will be happy. - Wally's Keynote Speech
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Scientists will eventually stop flailing around with solar power and focus their efforts on harnessing the only truly unlimited source of energy on the planet: stupidity. I predict that in the future, scientists will learn how to convert stupidity into clean fuel.
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If you have any trouble sounding condescending, find a Unix user to show you how it's done.
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Of course I don't look busy, I did it right the first time.
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I had several different bosses during the early years of 'Dilbert.' They were all pretty sure I was mocking someone else.
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I calculated the total time that humans have waited for web pages to load. It cancels out all the productivity gains of the information age. Sometimes I think the web is a big plot to keep people like me away from normal society.
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For the record, I am not a nut. I am an optimist. That's exactly like a nut except with a better attitude.
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Am I getting smart with you? How would you know?
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Decisions are made by people who have time, not people who have talent.
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