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For the record, I am not a nut. I am an optimist. That's exactly like a nut except with a better attitude.

Scott Adams

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Scott Adams
Age: 67
Born: 1957
Born: June 8
Blogger
Comic Strip Creator
Comics Artist
Economist
Engineer
Journalist
Writer
Windham
New York
Scott Raymond Adams
Optimism
Exactly
Record
Except
Records
Attitude
Better
Optimist
Like
Nuts

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Every credible scientist on earth says your products harm the environment. I recommend paying weasels to write articles casting doubt on the data. Then eat the wrong kind of foods and hope you die before the earth does.
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Continuing to believe the same thing, even in the face of new evidence to the contrary, is the definition of insanity - except in politics where it's called leadership.
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There's kind of a toll you have to pay with a cat if you don't pet her for 10 minutes she'll bother you for six hours.
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People are so conditioned to take sides that a balanced analysis looks to them like hatred.
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You might think the word homemade is just a word we use as a marketing ploy. But what you don't realize is that the staff sleeps here at night. If your tablecloth is wrinkled, that's why.
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Work is like the rest of life. The best parts are free.
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Give a man a fish, and you'll feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish, and he'll buy a funny hat. Talk to a hungry man about fish, and you're a consultant.
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You already barely exist. Disappearing entirely won't be that much of a change.
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Engineers like to solve problems. If there are no problems handily available, they will create their own problems.
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Sadness is just another word for not enough coffee.
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Our perceptions of truth are built around what is practical, not what is true. Even the smartest human brain doesn't have the capacity for discerning true facts. That's why so many of us settle for scientific facts. It's the best we can do.
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In the future, it will become increasingly obvious that your competitors are just as clueless as you are.
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The best you can hope for in this life is that your delusions are benign and your compulsions have utility.
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Normal people... believe that if it ain't broke, don't fix it. Engineers believe that if it ain't broke, it doesn't have enough features yet.
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Of course I don't look busy, I did it right the first time.
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If free will exists, why do the tallest candidates with the best hair usually win elections ?
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E-books are impervious to analogy.
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I rank money higher than social life or meaning because once you have money, those other things are easier to get. For example, you won't have much of a social life if you can't afford to do anything. And you can't make money if your health is a mess.
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In yesterday's post, I asked how many of you guys would have sex with a robot if it was indistinguishable from a hot human woman. About 95% of the hetero guys said they would. The other 5% expressed a strong preference for lying.
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I hated my work. It never seemed to me to be what I should be doing.
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