Quote

In the future, airplanes will be flown by a dog and a pilot. And the dog's job will be to make sure that if the pilot tries to touch any of the buttons, the dog bites him.

Scott Adams

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Scott Adams
Age: 67
Born: 1957
Born: June 8
Blogger
Comic Strip Creator
Comics Artist
Economist
Engineer
Journalist
Writer
Windham
New York
Scott Raymond Adams
Technology
Pilot
Sure
Buttons
Future
Pilots
Jobs
Bites
Science
Airplane
Trying
Tries
Make
Touch
Flown
Dog
Airplanes

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The greenest home is the one you don't build. If you really want to save the Earth, move in with another family and share a house that's already built. Better yet, live in the forest and eat whatever the squirrels don't want.
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You already barely exist. Disappearing entirely won't be that much of a change.
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The maintenance man is moving the thermostat in our office today. I started talking with him about the
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Am I getting smart with you? How would you know?
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Everyone, including skeptics, will generate delusions that match their views. That is how a normal and healthy brain works. Skeptics are not exempt from self-delusion.
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Work is like the rest of life. The best parts are free.
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We expect others to act rationally even though we are irrational.
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Failure is where success likes to hide in plain sight.
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My old life - no amount of getting used to it would have made it right.
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Normal people... believe that if it ain't broke, don't fix it. Engineers believe that if it ain't broke, it doesn't have enough features yet.
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For our purposes, let’s say a goal is a specific objective that you either achieve or don’t sometime in the future. A system is something you do on a regular basis that increases your odds of happiness in the long run. If you do something every day, it’s a system. If you’re waiting to achieve it someday in the future, it’s a goal.
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Every credible scientist on earth says your products harm the environment. I recommend paying weasels to write articles casting doubt on the data. Then eat the wrong kind of foods and hope you die before the earth does.
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Your business clothes are naturally attracted to staining liquids. This attraction is strongest just before an important meeting.
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For most of my career I did one comic a day, every day, including weekends and holidays.
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My philosophy is that every phone conversation has a loser.
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A rental car is basically an ashtray on wheels.
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The human mind is a delusion generator, not a window to trurh.
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The best part about being my age is in knowing how my life worked out. Sure, there's a lot more living to go, but there isn't much doubt that I'll always be the 'Dilbert guy.' Unless I go on a crime spree, in which case I'll be that stabbin Dilbert guy.
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The amount of energy spent laughing at a joke should be directly proportional to the hierarchical status of the joke teller.
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If your boss gets drunk and offers to photocopy her posterior, do not helpfully suggest pressing reduce 75%.
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