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My old life - no amount of getting used to it would have made it right.

Scott Adams

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Scott Adams
Age: 67
Born: 1957
Born: June 8
Blogger
Comic Strip Creator
Comics Artist
Economist
Engineer
Journalist
Writer
Windham
New York
Scott Raymond Adams
Used
Right
Made
Would
Life
Amount
Getting

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The human population is 90% gullible, violence-prone dipshits.
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I'm curious how you'll know it works. I assume it's mostly a cosmetic change.
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Remind people that profit is the difference between revenue and expense. This makes you look smart.
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For most of my career I did one comic a day, every day, including weekends and holidays.
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We expect others to act rationally even though we are irrational.
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Great minds don't think alike. If they did, the Patent Office would only have about fifty inventions.
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Failure is where success likes to hide in plain sight.
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The source of all unhappiness is other people. As soon as you learn to think of other people as noisy furniture, the sooner you will be happy. - Wally's Keynote Speech
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I was busier than a beaver in a coffee lake.
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Men live in a fantasy world. I know this because I am one, and I actually receive my mail there
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Dance like it hurts. Love like you need money. Work when people are watching. -- Dogbert's Motto
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The human mind is a delusion generator, not a window to trurh.
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There is no idea so bad that it cannot be made to look brilliant with the proper application of fonts and color.
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Dogbert: So, Since Columbus is dead, you have no evidence that the earth is round. Dilbert: Look. You can Ask Senator John Glenn. He orbited the earth when he was an astronaut. Dogbert: So, your theory depends on the honesty of politicians. Dilbert: Yes... no, wait.
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There are always deadlines I have to meet. I don't let myself get too close to the deadlines, so it's not like I'm just sweating bullets or anything if the clock is ticking. I never let myself get in that situation.
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I calculated the total time that humans have waited for web pages to load. It cancels out all the productivity gains of the information age. Sometimes I think the web is a big plot to keep people like me away from normal society.
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For our purposes, let’s say a goal is a specific objective that you either achieve or don’t sometime in the future. A system is something you do on a regular basis that increases your odds of happiness in the long run. If you do something every day, it’s a system. If you’re waiting to achieve it someday in the future, it’s a goal.
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Some of my best friends are Venture Capitalists, but let's face it, a hamster with Alzheimer's could make those kind of numbers. It's great work if you can get it.
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Most success springs from an obstacle or failure. I became a cartoonist largely because I failed in my goal of becoming a successful executive.
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Scientists often invent words to fill the holes in their understanding.These words are meant as conveniences until real understanding can be found. ... Words such as dimension and field and infinity ... are not descriptions of reality, yet we accept them as such because everyone is sure someone else knows what the words mean.
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