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This happens to me: I have this great idea and then I make the mistake of telling someone else.

Scott Adams

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Scott Adams
Age: 67
Born: 1957
Born: June 8
Blogger
Comic Strip Creator
Comics Artist
Economist
Engineer
Journalist
Writer
Windham
New York
Scott Raymond Adams
Ideas
Great
Make
Telling
Mistake
Idea
Else
Happens
Someone

More quotes by Scott Adams

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For the record, I am not a nut. I am an optimist. That's exactly like a nut except with a better attitude.
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Your business clothes are naturally attracted to staining liquids. This attraction is strongest just before an important meeting.
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I have infinite capacity to do more work as long as you don't mind that my quality approaches zero.
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The best you can hope for in this life is that your delusions are benign and your compulsions have utility.
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The longer you verk here, diverse it gets.
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In yesterday's post, I asked how many of you guys would have sex with a robot if it was indistinguishable from a hot human woman. About 95% of the hetero guys said they would. The other 5% expressed a strong preference for lying.
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Most success springs from an obstacle or failure.
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For five hundred dollars, I'll name a subatomic particle after you. Some of my satisfied customers include Arthur C. Quark and George Meson.
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On the keyboard of life, always keep one finger on the escape key.
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My old life - no amount of getting used to it would have made it right.
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Dogbert: So, Since Columbus is dead, you have no evidence that the earth is round. Dilbert: Look. You can Ask Senator John Glenn. He orbited the earth when he was an astronaut. Dogbert: So, your theory depends on the honesty of politicians. Dilbert: Yes... no, wait.
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The amount of energy spent laughing at a joke should be directly proportional to the hierarchical status of the joke teller.
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In case the rest of you missed it, the inspirational speech was: 'If you work hard, you can achieve great things. And then you die'.
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Dinosaur: I plan to use punctuated equilibrium to turn this zit into a third eye. Catbert: That's not a natural advantage. You'd better stay away from the fitter dinosaurs.
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I keep hearing the argument that some things are constitutional while other things are not. The idea is that we should be in favor of all the things that were decided over 200 years ago by a bunch of slave-owning cross-dressers who pooped in holes.
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Remind people that profit is the difference between revenue and expense. This makes you look smart.
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As a fan, I'm distraught, but as a cartoonist looking at new vacant spaces in 2400 newspapers, well, behind me, my cats are dancing a conga line.
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Scientists will eventually stop flailing around with solar power and focus their efforts on harnessing the only truly unlimited source of energy on the planet: stupidity. I predict that in the future, scientists will learn how to convert stupidity into clean fuel.
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Caring about the quality of your work causes stress. Stress can kill you. Maintain good health by remembering that the stockholders are complete strangers who have never done anything for you.
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And bring me a hard copy of the Internet so I can do some serious surfing.
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