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In less enlightened times, the best way to impress women was to own a hot car.

Scott Adams

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Scott Adams
Age: 67
Born: 1957
Born: June 8
Blogger
Comic Strip Creator
Comics Artist
Economist
Engineer
Journalist
Writer
Windham
New York
Scott Raymond Adams
Hot
Car
Less
Times
Women
Best
Way
Impress
Enlightened

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I believe in karma... that means i can do bad things to you all day long and assume you deserve it.
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Few things in life are less efficient than a group of people trying to write a sentence. The advantage of this method is that you end up with something for which you will not be personally blamed.
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One of the great things about being ignorant is that I often think my ideas are original. It's a wonderful feeling. That's why I try to avoid any knowledge that would spoil the sensation. Sometimes it isn't easy. People keep hurling knowledge at me, and I can't always duck.
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The best any human can do is to pick a delusion that helps him get through the day
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Nothing inspires forgiveness quite like revenge.
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Engineers like to solve problems. If there are no problems handily available, they will create their own problems.
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Dogbert gazing at night sky No matter how bad the day is, the stars are always there. Dilbert Actually, many of them burned out years ago, but their light is just now reaching earth. DogbertThank you for shattering my comfortable misconception. DilbertIt's the miracle of science.
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There's no such thing as good ideas and bad ideas. There are only your own ideas and other people's. If you want someone to like your idea, tell him he said it first last week and you just remembered it.
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I keep hearing the argument that some things are constitutional while other things are not. The idea is that we should be in favor of all the things that were decided over 200 years ago by a bunch of slave-owning cross-dressers who pooped in holes.
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Normal people... believe that if it ain't broke, don't fix it. Engineers believe that if it ain't broke, it doesn't have enough features yet.
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Dance like it hurts. Love like you need money. Work when people are watching. -- Dogbert's Motto
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As long as there are annoying people in the world, I won't run out of material.
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The maintenance man is moving the thermostat in our office today. I started talking with him about the
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If you’re going to create, create a lot. Creativity is not like playing the slot machines, where failure to win means you go home broke. With creativity, if you don’t win, you’re usually no worse off than if you hadn’t played.
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Your business clothes are naturally attracted to staining liquids. This attraction is strongest just before an important meeting.
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The people who think a guy walked on water versus the people who think a horse can fly.
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Everything you learn becomes a shortcut for understanding something else.
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Have you ever noticed that things that don’t kill you make you weaker? And great minds don’t think alike. If they did, the patent office would only have about fifty inventions. I started getting suspicious when I cried over spilt milk and the cashier took it off my bill.” - Wally
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Dogbert: So, Since Columbus is dead, you have no evidence that the earth is round. Dilbert: Look. You can Ask Senator John Glenn. He orbited the earth when he was an astronaut. Dogbert: So, your theory depends on the honesty of politicians. Dilbert: Yes... no, wait.
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Great minds don't think alike. If they did, the Patent Office would only have about fifty inventions.
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