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On the keyboard of life, always keep one finger on the escape key.

Scott Adams

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Scott Adams
Age: 67
Born: 1957
Born: June 8
Blogger
Comic Strip Creator
Comics Artist
Economist
Engineer
Journalist
Writer
Windham
New York
Scott Raymond Adams
Keys
Computer
Wisdom
Keyboard
Keep
Keyboards
Always
Geek
Life
Finger
Escape
Fingers

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Of course I don't look busy, I did it right the first time.
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Reality is always controlled by the people who are the most insane.
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Dogbert gazing at night sky No matter how bad the day is, the stars are always there. Dilbert Actually, many of them burned out years ago, but their light is just now reaching earth. DogbertThank you for shattering my comfortable misconception. DilbertIt's the miracle of science.
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Nothing inspires forgiveness quite like revenge.
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Dogbert: So, Since Columbus is dead, you have no evidence that the earth is round. Dilbert: Look. You can Ask Senator John Glenn. He orbited the earth when he was an astronaut. Dogbert: So, your theory depends on the honesty of politicians. Dilbert: Yes... no, wait.
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Have you ever noticed that things that don’t kill you make you weaker? And great minds don’t think alike. If they did, the patent office would only have about fifty inventions. I started getting suspicious when I cried over spilt milk and the cashier took it off my bill.” - Wally
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No matter how many times I visit New York City, I am always struck by the same thing - a yellow taxicab.
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Give a man a fish, and you'll feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish, and he'll buy a funny hat. Talk to a hungry man about fish, and you're a consultant.
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You can change only what people know, not what they do.
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Most success springs from an obstacle or failure.
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God designs people's emotions so you fall in love with people who, in return, wouldn't even use your hollowed-out skull for a spittoon.
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I have infinite capacity to do more work as long as you don't mind that my quality approaches zero.
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There's kind of a toll you have to pay with a cat if you don't pet her for 10 minutes she'll bother you for six hours.
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I love magazines. It's such McNugget kind of information.
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Ratbert (as lab rat, to scientist): Doc, we have to talk. Every day you feed me over a hundred pounds of macaroni and cheese. At first I thought you were just being a good host. But lately I've been thinking it could be something far more sinister.
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There’s nothing more humbling than seeing your best quotes in a list, and thinking they could have been written by a coma patient with a keyboard and spasms.
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You can never underestimate the stupidity of the general public.
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Failure is a resource that can be managed.
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For the record, I am not a nut. I am an optimist. That's exactly like a nut except with a better attitude.
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