Quote

He was tenser than Jesse Jackson on Father's Day.

Scott Adams

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Scott Adams
Age: 67
Born: 1957
Born: June 8
Blogger
Comic Strip Creator
Comics Artist
Economist
Engineer
Journalist
Writer
Windham
New York
Scott Raymond Adams
Jesse
Jackson
Sex
Father

More quotes by Scott Adams

Image
If I liked food and disliked exercise as much as a 400 pound guy, I'd be a 400 pound guy.
Scott Adams
Image
One of the great things about being ignorant is that I often think my ideas are original. It's a wonderful feeling. That's why I try to avoid any knowledge that would spoil the sensation. Sometimes it isn't easy. People keep hurling knowledge at me, and I can't always duck.
Scott Adams
Image
The human mind is a delusion generator, not a window to trurh.
Scott Adams
Image
Boss: I just heard that light travels faster than sound. I'm wondering if I should shout when I speak, just so my lips appear to sync-up with my words.
Scott Adams
Image
Dilbert: Evolution must be true because it is a logical conclusion of the scientific method. Dogbert: But science is based on the irrational belief that because we cannot perceive reality all at once, things called time and cause and effect exist. Dilbert: That's what I was taught and that's what I believe. Dogbert: Sounds cultish.
Scott Adams
Image
The amount of energy spent laughing at a joke should be directly proportional to the hierarchical status of the joke teller.
Scott Adams
Image
If you’re going to create, create a lot. Creativity is not like playing the slot machines, where failure to win means you go home broke. With creativity, if you don’t win, you’re usually no worse off than if you hadn’t played.
Scott Adams
Image
Dogbert gazing at night sky No matter how bad the day is, the stars are always there. Dilbert Actually, many of them burned out years ago, but their light is just now reaching earth. DogbertThank you for shattering my comfortable misconception. DilbertIt's the miracle of science.
Scott Adams
Image
Men live in a fantasy world. I know this because I am one, and I actually receive my mail there
Scott Adams
Image
E-books are impervious to analogy.
Scott Adams
Image
Every credible scientist on earth says your products harm the environment. I recommend paying weasels to write articles casting doubt on the data. Then eat the wrong kind of foods and hope you die before the earth does.
Scott Adams
Image
People are so conditioned to take sides that a balanced analysis looks to them like hatred.
Scott Adams
Image
Remind people that profit is the difference between revenue and expense. This makes you look smart.
Scott Adams
Image
The maintenance man is moving the thermostat in our office today. I started talking with him about the
Scott Adams
Image
This happens to me: I have this great idea and then I make the mistake of telling someone else.
Scott Adams
Image
For our purposes, let’s say a goal is a specific objective that you either achieve or don’t sometime in the future. A system is something you do on a regular basis that increases your odds of happiness in the long run. If you do something every day, it’s a system. If you’re waiting to achieve it someday in the future, it’s a goal.
Scott Adams
Image
Everything you learn becomes a shortcut for understanding something else.
Scott Adams
Image
There's no such thing as good ideas and bad ideas. There are only your own ideas and other people's. If you want someone to like your idea, tell him he said it first last week and you just remembered it.
Scott Adams
Image
Dogbert: So, Since Columbus is dead, you have no evidence that the earth is round. Dilbert: Look. You can Ask Senator John Glenn. He orbited the earth when he was an astronaut. Dogbert: So, your theory depends on the honesty of politicians. Dilbert: Yes... no, wait.
Scott Adams
Image
The longer you verk here, diverse it gets.
Scott Adams