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If you haven't already told your kids 'don't fellate the president' then you're probably a bad parent.

Scott Adams

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Scott Adams
Age: 67
Born: 1957
Born: June 8
Blogger
Comic Strip Creator
Comics Artist
Economist
Engineer
Journalist
Writer
Windham
New York
Scott Raymond Adams
Havens
Haven
Already
Told
Probably
Parent
President
Kids

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In less enlightened times, the best way to impress women was to own a hot car.
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The first time you see something that you have never seen before, you almost always know right away if you should eat it or run away from it.
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Large corporations welcome innovation and individualism in the same way the dinosaurs welcomed large meteors.
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My old life - no amount of getting used to it would have made it right.
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Men live in a fantasy world. I know this because I am one, and I actually receive my mail there
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There is no idea so bad that it cannot be made to look brilliant with the proper application of fonts and color.
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I think the pleasure of completed work is what makes blogging so popular. You have to believe most bloggers have few if any actual readers. The writers are in it for other reasons. Blogging is like work, but without coworkers thwarting you at every turn. All you get is the pleasure of a completed task.
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Informed decision-making comes from a long tradition of guessing and then blaming others for inadequate results.
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Needing someone is like needing a parachute. If they are not there the first time you need them, chances are you won't be needing them again.
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Dinosaur: I plan to use punctuated equilibrium to turn this zit into a third eye. Catbert: That's not a natural advantage. You'd better stay away from the fitter dinosaurs.
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We're a planet of nearly six billion ninnies living in a civilization that was designed by a few thousand amazingly smart deviants.
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No matter how many times I visit New York City, I am always struck by the same thing - a yellow taxicab.
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Continuing to believe the same thing, even in the face of new evidence to the contrary, is the definition of insanity - except in politics where it's called leadership.
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Everyone, including skeptics, will generate delusions that match their views. That is how a normal and healthy brain works. Skeptics are not exempt from self-delusion.
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If you’re going to create, create a lot. Creativity is not like playing the slot machines, where failure to win means you go home broke. With creativity, if you don’t win, you’re usually no worse off than if you hadn’t played.
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The best things in life are silly.
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Let's form proactive synergy restructuring teams.
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Tell me what you need, and I'll tell you how to get along without it.
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In fact, most people are being squeezed in their little cubicle, and their creativity is forced out elsewhere, because the company can't use it. The company is organized to get rid of variants.
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You can never underestimate the stupidity of the general public.
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