Quote

If you haven't already told your kids 'don't fellate the president' then you're probably a bad parent.

Scott Adams

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Scott Adams
Age: 67
Born: 1957
Born: June 8
Blogger
Comic Strip Creator
Comics Artist
Economist
Engineer
Journalist
Writer
Windham
New York
Scott Raymond Adams
Havens
Haven
Already
Told
Probably
Parent
President
Kids

More quotes by Scott Adams

Image
If I had to pick one quality that best predicts success (other than wanting to be successful) it would be the willingness to risk embarrassment.
Scott Adams
Image
For the record, I am not a nut. I am an optimist. That's exactly like a nut except with a better attitude.
Scott Adams
Image
If you spend all your time arguing with people who are nuts, you'll be exhausted and the nuts will still be nuts.
Scott Adams
Image
Ratbert (as lab rat, to scientist): Doc, we have to talk. Every day you feed me over a hundred pounds of macaroni and cheese. At first I thought you were just being a good host. But lately I've been thinking it could be something far more sinister.
Scott Adams
Image
I keep hearing the argument that some things are constitutional while other things are not. The idea is that we should be in favor of all the things that were decided over 200 years ago by a bunch of slave-owning cross-dressers who pooped in holes.
Scott Adams
Image
The most ineffective workers are systematically moved to the place where they can do the least damage: management.
Scott Adams
Image
God designs people's emotions so you fall in love with people who, in return, wouldn't even use your hollowed-out skull for a spittoon.
Scott Adams
Image
You don't have to be a 'person of influence' to be influential. In fact, the most influential people in my life are probably not even aware of the things they've taught me.
Scott Adams
Image
If I liked food and disliked exercise as much as a 400 pound guy, I'd be a 400 pound guy.
Scott Adams
Image
There's no such thing as good ideas and bad ideas. There are only your own ideas and other people's. If you want someone to like your idea, tell him he said it first last week and you just remembered it.
Scott Adams
Image
Reporters are faced with the daily choice of painstakingly researching stories or writing whatever people tell them. Both approaches pay the same.
Scott Adams
Image
My old life - no amount of getting used to it would have made it right.
Scott Adams
Image
Some of my best friends are Venture Capitalists, but let's face it, a hamster with Alzheimer's could make those kind of numbers. It's great work if you can get it.
Scott Adams
Image
I have infinite capacity to do more work as long as you don't mind that my quality approaches zero.
Scott Adams
Image
The Dilbert Principle: People are idiots.
Scott Adams
Image
There’s nothing more humbling than seeing your best quotes in a list, and thinking they could have been written by a coma patient with a keyboard and spasms.
Scott Adams
Image
In less enlightened times, the best way to impress women was to own a hot car.
Scott Adams
Image
Home is pretty utopian.
Scott Adams
Image
The source of all unhappiness is other people. As soon as you learn to think of other people as noisy furniture, the sooner you will be happy. - Wally's Keynote Speech
Scott Adams
Image
Failure is a resource that can be managed.
Scott Adams