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The most ineffective workers are systematically moved to the place where they can do the least damage: management.
Scott Adams
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Scott Adams
Age: 67
Born: 1957
Born: June 8
Blogger
Comic Strip Creator
Comics Artist
Economist
Engineer
Journalist
Writer
Windham
New York
Scott Raymond Adams
Workers
Moved
Least
Funny
Ineffective
Business
Systematically
Place
Presentation
Work
Damage
Management
More quotes by Scott Adams
Let's form proactive synergy restructuring teams.
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If I liked food and disliked exercise as much as a 400 pound guy, I'd be a 400 pound guy.
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Every generation of humans believed it had all the answers it needed, except for a few mysteries they assumed would be solved at any moment. And they all believed their ancestors were simplistic and deluded. What are the odds that you are the first generation of humans who will understand reality ?
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I think the pleasure of completed work is what makes blogging so popular. You have to believe most bloggers have few if any actual readers. The writers are in it for other reasons. Blogging is like work, but without coworkers thwarting you at every turn. All you get is the pleasure of a completed task.
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Everyone says there's a lack of leadership in the world these days. I think we should all be thankful, because the only reason for leadership is to convince people to do things that are either dangerous (like invading another country) or stupid (working extra hard without extra pay).
Scott Adams
Dogbert: So, Since Columbus is dead, you have no evidence that the earth is round. Dilbert: Look. You can Ask Senator John Glenn. He orbited the earth when he was an astronaut. Dogbert: So, your theory depends on the honesty of politicians. Dilbert: Yes... no, wait.
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Decisions are made by people who have time, not people who have talent.
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The longer you verk here, diverse it gets.
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You can change only what people know, not what they do.
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Dinosaur: I plan to use punctuated equilibrium to turn this zit into a third eye. Catbert: That's not a natural advantage. You'd better stay away from the fitter dinosaurs.
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For five hundred dollars, I'll name a subatomic particle after you. Some of my satisfied customers include Arthur C. Quark and George Meson.
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In the future, airplanes will be flown by a dog and a pilot. And the dog's job will be to make sure that if the pilot tries to touch any of the buttons, the dog bites him.
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There's nothing more dangerous than a resourceful idiot.
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Dance like it hurts. Love like you need money. Work when people are watching. -- Dogbert's Motto
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Every credible scientist on earth says your products harm the environment. I recommend paying weasels to write articles casting doubt on the data. Then eat the wrong kind of foods and hope you die before the earth does.
Scott Adams
In less enlightened times, the best way to impress women was to own a hot car.
Scott Adams
I believe everybody in the world should have guns. Citizens should have bazookas and rocket launchers too. I believe that all citizens should have their weapons of choice. However, I also believe that only I should have the ammunition. Because frankly, I wouldn't trust the rest of the goobers with anything more dangerous than string.
Scott Adams
Work is like the rest of life. The best parts are free.
Scott Adams
You can never underestimate the stupidity of the general public.
Scott Adams
'Dilbert' became popular during the downsizing of the '90s, and job security was a major theme of the strip.
Scott Adams
