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I was busier than a beaver in a coffee lake.

Scott Adams

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Scott Adams
Age: 67
Born: 1957
Born: June 8
Blogger
Comic Strip Creator
Comics Artist
Economist
Engineer
Journalist
Writer
Windham
New York
Scott Raymond Adams
Beaver
Busier
Beavers
Lake
Lakes
Coffee

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I should have written that down. - Dilbert
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My philosophy is that every phone conversation has a loser.
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Decisions are made by people who have time, not people who have talent.
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Dilbert: I'm obsessed with inventing a perpetual motion machine. Most scientists think it's impossible, but I have something they don't. Dogbert: A lot of spare time? Dilbert: Exactly.
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I rank money higher than social life or meaning because once you have money, those other things are easier to get. For example, you won't have much of a social life if you can't afford to do anything. And you can't make money if your health is a mess.
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The maintenance man is moving the thermostat in our office today. I started talking with him about the
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Remember, freedom is always taken, never given.
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Few things in life are less efficient than a group of people trying to write a sentence. The advantage of this method is that you end up with something for which you will not be personally blamed.
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You might think the word homemade is just a word we use as a marketing ploy. But what you don't realize is that the staff sleeps here at night. If your tablecloth is wrinkled, that's why.
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Sadness is just another word for not enough coffee.
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I was surprised to learn that doing household chores qualifies as romantic for most of you [women]. That's exactly why you should never hire a butler if you strike it rich - the minute that Jeeves starts unloading the dishwasher without being asked, your wife is going to start humping his leg.
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Always remember that as long as other people are gullible, there's no limit to what you can achieve.
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One of the great things about being ignorant is that I often think my ideas are original. It's a wonderful feeling. That's why I try to avoid any knowledge that would spoil the sensation. Sometimes it isn't easy. People keep hurling knowledge at me, and I can't always duck.
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It doesn't take many people to have a bad sense of humor to get in trouble at a corporation.
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Of course I don't look busy, I did it right the first time.
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Your business clothes are naturally attracted to staining liquids. This attraction is strongest just before an important meeting.
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When life gives you lemons... choke on them and die... you stupid lemon eater.
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Scientists will eventually stop flailing around with solar power and focus their efforts on harnessing the only truly unlimited source of energy on the planet: stupidity. I predict that in the future, scientists will learn how to convert stupidity into clean fuel.
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Most success springs from an obstacle or failure. I became a cartoonist largely because I failed in my goal of becoming a successful executive.
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When virtual reality gets cheaper than dating, society is doomed.
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