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Boss: I just heard that light travels faster than sound. I'm wondering if I should shout when I speak, just so my lips appear to sync-up with my words.
Scott Adams
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Scott Adams
Age: 67
Born: 1957
Born: June 8
Blogger
Comic Strip Creator
Comics Artist
Economist
Engineer
Journalist
Writer
Windham
New York
Scott Raymond Adams
Light
Lips
Wonder
Sync
Heard
Travels
Knowledge
Shout
Sound
Wondering
Words
Boss
Speak
Appear
Science
Faster
More quotes by Scott Adams
If you spend all your time arguing with people who are nuts, you'll be exhausted and the nuts will still be nuts.
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There's a fine line between participation and mockery.
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Every credible scientist on earth says your products harm the environment. I recommend paying weasels to write articles casting doubt on the data. Then eat the wrong kind of foods and hope you die before the earth does.
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I calculated the total time that humans have waited for web pages to load. It cancels out all the productivity gains of the information age. Sometimes I think the web is a big plot to keep people like me away from normal society.
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Continuing to believe the same thing, even in the face of new evidence to the contrary, is the definition of insanity - except in politics where it's called leadership.
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If free will exists, why do the tallest candidates with the best hair usually win elections ?
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I'm curious how you'll know it works. I assume it's mostly a cosmetic change.
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The best part about being my age is in knowing how my life worked out.
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There is no idea so bad that it cannot be made to look brilliant with the proper application of fonts and color.
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In case the rest of you missed it, the inspirational speech was: 'If you work hard, you can achieve great things. And then you die'.
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The human population is 90% gullible, violence-prone dipshits.
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Normal people... believe that if it ain't broke, don't fix it. Engineers believe that if it ain't broke, it doesn't have enough features yet.
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One of the great things about being ignorant is that I often think my ideas are original. It's a wonderful feeling. That's why I try to avoid any knowledge that would spoil the sensation. Sometimes it isn't easy. People keep hurling knowledge at me, and I can't always duck.
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Everything you learn becomes a shortcut for understanding something else.
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I have a perverse attraction to risk. Not physical risk but emotional, financial risk - anything than can't kill you immediately.
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Work is like the rest of life. The best parts are free.
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Scientists will eventually stop flailing around with solar power and focus their efforts on harnessing the only truly unlimited source of energy on the planet: stupidity. I predict that in the future, scientists will learn how to convert stupidity into clean fuel.
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You already barely exist. Disappearing entirely won't be that much of a change.
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The Dilbert Principle: People are idiots.
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Always remember that as long as other people are gullible, there's no limit to what you can achieve.
Scott Adams