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Of course I don't look busy, I did it right the first time.

Scott Adams

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Scott Adams
Age: 67
Born: 1957
Born: June 8
Blogger
Comic Strip Creator
Comics Artist
Economist
Engineer
Journalist
Writer
Windham
New York
Scott Raymond Adams
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Firsts
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More quotes by Scott Adams

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I have infinite capacity to do more work as long as you don't mind that my quality approaches zero.
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Your business clothes are naturally attracted to staining liquids. This attraction is strongest just before an important meeting.
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I love magazines. It's such McNugget kind of information.
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Ask a deeply religious Christian if he’d rather live next to a bearded Muslim that may or may not be plotting a terror attack, or an atheist that may or may not show him how to set up a wireless network in his house. On the scale of prejudice, atheists don’t seem so bad lately.
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I believe in karma... that means i can do bad things to you all day long and assume you deserve it.
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I'm predicting that we'll finally have a computer will search my e-mail automatically and delete every message that begins with 'thought you'd be interested,' and then give an electrical shock to the sender to remind him or her to stop send that kind of message.
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The first time you see something that you have never seen before, you almost always know right away if you should eat it or run away from it.
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The most ineffective workers are systematically moved to the place where they can do the least damage: management.
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Everyone says there's a lack of leadership in the world these days. I think we should all be thankful, because the only reason for leadership is to convince people to do things that are either dangerous (like invading another country) or stupid (working extra hard without extra pay).
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On the keyboard of life, always keep one finger on the escape key.
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The best you can hope for in this life is that your delusions are benign and your compulsions have utility.
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I keep hearing the argument that some things are constitutional while other things are not. The idea is that we should be in favor of all the things that were decided over 200 years ago by a bunch of slave-owning cross-dressers who pooped in holes.
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My old life - no amount of getting used to it would have made it right.
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He was tenser than Jesse Jackson on Father's Day.
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If free will exists, why do the tallest candidates with the best hair usually win elections ?
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You already barely exist. Disappearing entirely won't be that much of a change.
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No matter how many times I visit New York City, I am always struck by the same thing - a yellow taxicab.
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Newsreader: A huge asteroid could destroy Earth! And by coincidence, that's the subject of tonight's miniseries. Dogbert: In science, researchers proved that this simple device can keep idiots off your television screen. [TV remote control] Click.
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When life gives you lemons... choke on them and die... you stupid lemon eater.
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Your best work involves timing. If someone wrote the best hip hop song of all time in the Middle Ages, he had bad timing.
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