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The amount of energy spent laughing at a joke should be directly proportional to the hierarchical status of the joke teller.

Scott Adams

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Scott Adams
Age: 67
Born: 1957
Born: June 8
Blogger
Comic Strip Creator
Comics Artist
Economist
Engineer
Journalist
Writer
Windham
New York
Scott Raymond Adams
Laughter
Spent
Jokes
Hierarchical
Laughing
Teller
Amount
Proportional
Energy
Status
Directly
Joke

More quotes by Scott Adams

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Remind people that profit is the difference between revenue and expense. This makes you look smart.
Scott Adams
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I'm predicting that we'll finally have a computer will search my e-mail automatically and delete every message that begins with 'thought you'd be interested,' and then give an electrical shock to the sender to remind him or her to stop send that kind of message.
Scott Adams
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Reality is always controlled by the people who are the most insane.
Scott Adams
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Normal people... believe that if it ain't broke, don't fix it. Engineers believe that if it ain't broke, it doesn't have enough features yet.
Scott Adams
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In the future, it will become increasingly obvious that your competitors are just as clueless as you are.
Scott Adams
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If you want to kill an idea without being identified as the assassin, suggest that the legal department take a look at it.
Scott Adams
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There's kind of a toll you have to pay with a cat if you don't pet her for 10 minutes she'll bother you for six hours.
Scott Adams
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When virtual reality gets cheaper than dating, society is doomed.
Scott Adams
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If free will exists, why do the tallest candidates with the best hair usually win elections ?
Scott Adams
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One of the great things about being ignorant is that I often think my ideas are original. It's a wonderful feeling. That's why I try to avoid any knowledge that would spoil the sensation. Sometimes it isn't easy. People keep hurling knowledge at me, and I can't always duck.
Scott Adams
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I rank money higher than social life or meaning because once you have money, those other things are easier to get. For example, you won't have much of a social life if you can't afford to do anything. And you can't make money if your health is a mess.
Scott Adams
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I keep hearing the argument that some things are constitutional while other things are not. The idea is that we should be in favor of all the things that were decided over 200 years ago by a bunch of slave-owning cross-dressers who pooped in holes.
Scott Adams
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Have you ever noticed that things that don’t kill you make you weaker? And great minds don’t think alike. If they did, the patent office would only have about fifty inventions. I started getting suspicious when I cried over spilt milk and the cashier took it off my bill.” - Wally
Scott Adams
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The first time you see something that you have never seen before, you almost always know right away if you should eat it or run away from it.
Scott Adams
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I think the pleasure of completed work is what makes blogging so popular. You have to believe most bloggers have few if any actual readers. The writers are in it for other reasons. Blogging is like work, but without coworkers thwarting you at every turn. All you get is the pleasure of a completed task.
Scott Adams
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As a fan, I'm distraught, but as a cartoonist looking at new vacant spaces in 2400 newspapers, well, behind me, my cats are dancing a conga line.
Scott Adams
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We expect others to act rationally even though we are irrational.
Scott Adams
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Our perceptions of truth are built around what is practical, not what is true. Even the smartest human brain doesn't have the capacity for discerning true facts. That's why so many of us settle for scientific facts. It's the best we can do.
Scott Adams
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Dogbert: So, Since Columbus is dead, you have no evidence that the earth is round. Dilbert: Look. You can Ask Senator John Glenn. He orbited the earth when he was an astronaut. Dogbert: So, your theory depends on the honesty of politicians. Dilbert: Yes... no, wait.
Scott Adams
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There are always deadlines I have to meet. I don't let myself get too close to the deadlines, so it's not like I'm just sweating bullets or anything if the clock is ticking. I never let myself get in that situation.
Scott Adams