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The Dilbert Principle: People are idiots.

Scott Adams

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Scott Adams
Age: 67
Born: 1957
Born: June 8
Blogger
Comic Strip Creator
Comics Artist
Economist
Engineer
Journalist
Writer
Windham
New York
Scott Raymond Adams
Principle
Principles
People
Idiots
Idiot

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There’s nothing more humbling than seeing your best quotes in a list, and thinking they could have been written by a coma patient with a keyboard and spasms.
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Most success springs from an obstacle or failure.
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The best part about being my age is in knowing how my life worked out.
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Engineers like to solve problems. If there are no problems handily available, they will create their own problems.
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Scientists often invent words to fill the holes in their understanding.These words are meant as conveniences until real understanding can be found. ... Words such as dimension and field and infinity ... are not descriptions of reality, yet we accept them as such because everyone is sure someone else knows what the words mean.
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You don't have to be a 'person of influence' to be influential. In fact, the most influential people in my life are probably not even aware of the things they've taught me.
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He changed more times than a baby in a beer-drinking contest.
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The amount of energy spent laughing at a joke should be directly proportional to the hierarchical status of the joke teller.
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No matter how many times I visit New York City, I am always struck by the same thing - a yellow taxicab.
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My investments have been hurt.
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The human population is 90% gullible, violence-prone dipshits.
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Am I getting smart with you? How would you know?
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Dogbert: So, Since Columbus is dead, you have no evidence that the earth is round. Dilbert: Look. You can Ask Senator John Glenn. He orbited the earth when he was an astronaut. Dogbert: So, your theory depends on the honesty of politicians. Dilbert: Yes... no, wait.
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If your boss gets drunk and offers to photocopy her posterior, do not helpfully suggest pressing reduce 75%.
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The greenest home is the one you don't build. If you really want to save the Earth, move in with another family and share a house that's already built. Better yet, live in the forest and eat whatever the squirrels don't want.
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I rank money higher than social life or meaning because once you have money, those other things are easier to get. For example, you won't have much of a social life if you can't afford to do anything. And you can't make money if your health is a mess.
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I believe everybody in the world should have guns. Citizens should have bazookas and rocket launchers too. I believe that all citizens should have their weapons of choice. However, I also believe that only I should have the ammunition. Because frankly, I wouldn't trust the rest of the goobers with anything more dangerous than string.
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Needing someone is like needing a parachute. If they are not there the first time you need them, chances are you won't be needing them again.
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I love magazines. It's such McNugget kind of information.
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We expect others to act rationally even though we are irrational.
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