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There is no idea so bad that it cannot be made to look brilliant with the proper application of fonts and color.

Scott Adams

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Scott Adams
Age: 67
Born: 1957
Born: June 8
Blogger
Comic Strip Creator
Comics Artist
Economist
Engineer
Journalist
Writer
Windham
New York
Scott Raymond Adams
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More quotes by Scott Adams

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If you have any trouble sounding condescending, find a Unix user to show you how it's done.
Scott Adams
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The best things in life are silly.
Scott Adams
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Ratbert (as lab rat, to scientist): Doc, we have to talk. Every day you feed me over a hundred pounds of macaroni and cheese. At first I thought you were just being a good host. But lately I've been thinking it could be something far more sinister.
Scott Adams
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Great minds don't think alike. If they did, the Patent Office would only have about fifty inventions.
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People are so conditioned to take sides that a balanced analysis looks to them like hatred.
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Remember, freedom is always taken, never given.
Scott Adams
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I was busier than a beaver in a coffee lake.
Scott Adams
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Large corporations welcome innovation and individualism in the same way the dinosaurs welcomed large meteors.
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In case the rest of you missed it, the inspirational speech was: 'If you work hard, you can achieve great things. And then you die'.
Scott Adams
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For the record, I am not a nut. I am an optimist. That's exactly like a nut except with a better attitude.
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Every year, it takes more brains to navigate this complicated world. More people are falling below what I call the 'incompetence line' through no fault of their own.
Scott Adams
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There’s nothing more humbling than seeing your best quotes in a list, and thinking they could have been written by a coma patient with a keyboard and spasms.
Scott Adams
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The most ineffective workers are systematically moved to the place where they can do the least damage: management.
Scott Adams
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The human population is 90% gullible, violence-prone dipshits.
Scott Adams
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I try to manage my day by my circadian rhythms because the creativity is such an elusive thing, and I could easily just stomp over it doing my administrative stuff.
Scott Adams
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Dance like it hurts. Love like you need money. Work when people are watching. -- Dogbert's Motto
Scott Adams
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Dilbert: It took weeks but I've calculated a new theory about the origin of the universe. According to my calculations it didn't start with a Big Bang at all-it was more of Phhbwt sound. You may be wondering about the practical applications of the Little Phhbwt theory. Dogbert: I was wondering when you'll go away.
Scott Adams
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In yesterday's post, I asked how many of you guys would have sex with a robot if it was indistinguishable from a hot human woman. About 95% of the hetero guys said they would. The other 5% expressed a strong preference for lying.
Scott Adams
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I was surprised to learn that doing household chores qualifies as romantic for most of you [women]. That's exactly why you should never hire a butler if you strike it rich - the minute that Jeeves starts unloading the dishwasher without being asked, your wife is going to start humping his leg.
Scott Adams
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Scientists often invent words to fill the holes in their understanding.These words are meant as conveniences until real understanding can be found. ... Words such as dimension and field and infinity ... are not descriptions of reality, yet we accept them as such because everyone is sure someone else knows what the words mean.
Scott Adams