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Give a man a fish, and you'll feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish, and he'll buy a funny hat. Talk to a hungry man about fish, and you're a consultant.

Scott Adams

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Scott Adams
Age: 67
Born: 1957
Born: June 8
Blogger
Comic Strip Creator
Comics Artist
Economist
Engineer
Journalist
Writer
Windham
New York
Scott Raymond Adams
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Fish
Giving
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Hungry
Life
Cooking
Consultant
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More quotes by Scott Adams

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Everyone, including skeptics, will generate delusions that match their views. That is how a normal and healthy brain works. Skeptics are not exempt from self-delusion.
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Sadness is just another word for not enough coffee.
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Scientists often invent words to fill the holes in their understanding.These words are meant as conveniences until real understanding can be found. ... Words such as dimension and field and infinity ... are not descriptions of reality, yet we accept them as such because everyone is sure someone else knows what the words mean.
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Obviously there's not much options when you're a cartoonist - you pretty much either work at home or rent an office I guess, and working at home just seems easier.
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The Dilbert Principle: People are idiots.
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As long as there are annoying people in the world, I won't run out of material.
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And bring me a hard copy of the Internet so I can do some serious surfing.
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Your best work involves timing. If someone wrote the best hip hop song of all time in the Middle Ages, he had bad timing.
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In yesterday's post, I asked how many of you guys would have sex with a robot if it was indistinguishable from a hot human woman. About 95% of the hetero guys said they would. The other 5% expressed a strong preference for lying.
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The maintenance man is moving the thermostat in our office today. I started talking with him about the
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Work is like the rest of life. The best parts are free.
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Ask a deeply religious Christian if he’d rather live next to a bearded Muslim that may or may not be plotting a terror attack, or an atheist that may or may not show him how to set up a wireless network in his house. On the scale of prejudice, atheists don’t seem so bad lately.
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Caring about the quality of your work causes stress. Stress can kill you. Maintain good health by remembering that the stockholders are complete strangers who have never done anything for you.
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In the future, airplanes will be flown by a dog and a pilot. And the dog's job will be to make sure that if the pilot tries to touch any of the buttons, the dog bites him.
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Needing someone is like needing a parachute. If they are not there the first time you need them, chances are you won't be needing them again.
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If free will exists, why do the tallest candidates with the best hair usually win elections ?
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The longer you verk here, diverse it gets.
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Continuing to believe the same thing, even in the face of new evidence to the contrary, is the definition of insanity - except in politics where it's called leadership.
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E-books are impervious to analogy.
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Engineers like to solve problems. If there are no problems handily available, they will create their own problems.
Scott Adams