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I love magazines. It's such McNugget kind of information.

Scott Adams

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Scott Adams
Age: 67
Born: 1957
Born: June 8
Blogger
Comic Strip Creator
Comics Artist
Economist
Engineer
Journalist
Writer
Windham
New York
Scott Raymond Adams
Magazines
Information
Kind
Love

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Reality is always controlled by the people who are the most insane.
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You can never underestimate the stupidity of the general public.
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Tell me what you need, and I'll tell you how to get along without it.
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The best any human can do is to pick a delusion that helps him get through the day
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Of course I don't look busy, I did it right the first time.
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I rank money higher than social life or meaning because once you have money, those other things are easier to get. For example, you won't have much of a social life if you can't afford to do anything. And you can't make money if your health is a mess.
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Newsreader: A huge asteroid could destroy Earth! And by coincidence, that's the subject of tonight's miniseries. Dogbert: In science, researchers proved that this simple device can keep idiots off your television screen. [TV remote control] Click.
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Dogbert: So, Since Columbus is dead, you have no evidence that the earth is round. Dilbert: Look. You can Ask Senator John Glenn. He orbited the earth when he was an astronaut. Dogbert: So, your theory depends on the honesty of politicians. Dilbert: Yes... no, wait.
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Most success springs from an obstacle or failure.
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There is no idea so bad that it cannot be made to look brilliant with the proper application of fonts and color.
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Everything you learn becomes a shortcut for understanding something else.
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I had several different bosses during the early years of 'Dilbert.' They were all pretty sure I was mocking someone else.
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Let's form proactive synergy restructuring teams.
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You can change only what people know, not what they do.
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When life gives you lemons... choke on them and die... you stupid lemon eater.
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There's kind of a toll you have to pay with a cat if you don't pet her for 10 minutes she'll bother you for six hours.
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Give a man a fish, and you'll feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish, and he'll buy a funny hat. Talk to a hungry man about fish, and you're a consultant.
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I calculated the total time that humans have waited for web pages to load. It cancels out all the productivity gains of the information age. Sometimes I think the web is a big plot to keep people like me away from normal society.
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The best things in life are silly.
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He was tenser than Jesse Jackson on Father's Day.
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