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It doesn't take many people to have a bad sense of humor to get in trouble at a corporation.
Scott Adams
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Scott Adams
Age: 67
Born: 1957
Born: June 8
Blogger
Comic Strip Creator
Comics Artist
Economist
Engineer
Journalist
Writer
Windham
New York
Scott Raymond Adams
Take
Many
People
Corporation
Corporations
Humor
Trouble
Sense
Doesn
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Some people fear that technology will become more engaging than live human interactions. That's silly technology is already way more interesting than other people.
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Am I getting smart with you? How would you know?
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I believe in karma... that means i can do bad things to you all day long and assume you deserve it.
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Everyone, including skeptics, will generate delusions that match their views. That is how a normal and healthy brain works. Skeptics are not exempt from self-delusion.
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The best any human can do is to pick a delusion that helps him get through the day
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He was tenser than Jesse Jackson on Father's Day.
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I have infinite capacity to do more work as long as you don't mind that my quality approaches zero.
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This happens to me: I have this great idea and then I make the mistake of telling someone else.
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The source of all unhappiness is other people. As soon as you learn to think of other people as noisy furniture, the sooner you will be happy. - Wally's Keynote Speech
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I should have written that down. - Dilbert
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Normal people... believe that if it ain't broke, don't fix it. Engineers believe that if it ain't broke, it doesn't have enough features yet.
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Of course I don't look busy, I did it right the first time.
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I calculated the total time that humans have waited for web pages to load. It cancels out all the productivity gains of the information age. Sometimes I think the web is a big plot to keep people like me away from normal society.
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Hard work is rewarding. Taking credit for other people's hard work is rewarding and faster.
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Needing someone is like needing a parachute. If they are not there the first time you need them, chances are you won't be needing them again.
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Give a man a fish, and you'll feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish, and he'll buy a funny hat. Talk to a hungry man about fish, and you're a consultant.
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I hated my work. It never seemed to me to be what I should be doing.
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Every generation of humans believed it had all the answers it needed, except for a few mysteries they assumed would be solved at any moment. And they all believed their ancestors were simplistic and deluded. What are the odds that you are the first generation of humans who will understand reality ?
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One of the great things about being ignorant is that I often think my ideas are original. It's a wonderful feeling. That's why I try to avoid any knowledge that would spoil the sensation. Sometimes it isn't easy. People keep hurling knowledge at me, and I can't always duck.
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Few things in life are less efficient than a group of people trying to write a sentence. The advantage of this method is that you end up with something for which you will not be personally blamed.
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