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Remind people that profit is the difference between revenue and expense. This makes you look smart.
Scott Adams
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Scott Adams
Age: 67
Born: 1957
Born: June 8
Blogger
Comic Strip Creator
Comics Artist
Economist
Engineer
Journalist
Writer
Windham
New York
Scott Raymond Adams
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Business
Expense
Makes
Revenue
Look
Expenses
Looks
Remind
People
Profit
Smart
Difference
More quotes by Scott Adams
The source of all unhappiness is other people. As soon as you learn to think of other people as noisy furniture, the sooner you will be happy. - Wally's Keynote Speech
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Am I getting smart with you? How would you know?
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He was tenser than Jesse Jackson on Father's Day.
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As a fan, I'm distraught, but as a cartoonist looking at new vacant spaces in 2400 newspapers, well, behind me, my cats are dancing a conga line.
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I calculated the total time that humans have waited for web pages to load. It cancels out all the productivity gains of the information age. Sometimes I think the web is a big plot to keep people like me away from normal society.
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One of the great things about being ignorant is that I often think my ideas are original. It's a wonderful feeling. That's why I try to avoid any knowledge that would spoil the sensation. Sometimes it isn't easy. People keep hurling knowledge at me, and I can't always duck.
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The amount of energy spent laughing at a joke should be directly proportional to the hierarchical status of the joke teller.
Scott Adams
In case the rest of you missed it, the inspirational speech was: 'If you work hard, you can achieve great things. And then you die'.
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I was surprised to learn that doing household chores qualifies as romantic for most of you [women]. That's exactly why you should never hire a butler if you strike it rich - the minute that Jeeves starts unloading the dishwasher without being asked, your wife is going to start humping his leg.
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When you hire that first person, then you're a boss. You've got performance reviews. You've got complaints about not making enough money. You've got people who are just going to sell your story to the tabloids.
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Everyone says there's a lack of leadership in the world these days. I think we should all be thankful, because the only reason for leadership is to convince people to do things that are either dangerous (like invading another country) or stupid (working extra hard without extra pay).
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The first time you see something that you have never seen before, you almost always know right away if you should eat it or run away from it.
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There's kind of a toll you have to pay with a cat if you don't pet her for 10 minutes she'll bother you for six hours.
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The maintenance man is moving the thermostat in our office today. I started talking with him about the
Scott Adams
My old life - no amount of getting used to it would have made it right.
Scott Adams
Ratbert (as lab rat, to scientist): Doc, we have to talk. Every day you feed me over a hundred pounds of macaroni and cheese. At first I thought you were just being a good host. But lately I've been thinking it could be something far more sinister.
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In the future, it will become increasingly obvious that your competitors are just as clueless as you are.
Scott Adams
The best things in life are silly.
Scott Adams
I try to manage my day by my circadian rhythms because the creativity is such an elusive thing, and I could easily just stomp over it doing my administrative stuff.
Scott Adams
Continuing to believe the same thing, even in the face of new evidence to the contrary, is the definition of insanity - except in politics where it's called leadership.
Scott Adams
