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If you take a shower with your boyfriend, I guarantee by the time you step out of that shower, your breasts will be sparkling clean.
Sarah Silverman
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Sarah Silverman
Age: 53
Born: 1970
Born: December 1
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Guitarist
Screenwriter
Singer
Television Actor
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Bedford
New Hampshire
Sarah Kate Silverman
Time
Boyfriend
Guarantee
Breasts
Guarantees
Clean
Step
Sparkling
Steps
Shower
Take
Showers
More quotes by Sarah Silverman
I'm personally not into a guy who wears pedal pushers and a necklace.
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I can only speak from my own experience, and I would say that the depression I experienced feels like a chemical change. When it came over me, when it comes over me, it feels like it's coming over me like a flu.
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If I have to write by a certain time, I can pull through, but usually I just let stuff happen, hanging out with comic friends - or bringing a basic idea on stage and seeing if it goes anywhere.
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I just look like a transvestite when I try to dress up. There's no place to hide my balls.
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Scientology is weird because it's new.
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Being with friends felt like a burden. I remember just sobbing.
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If I don't do stand-up for two weeks, I get freaked out.
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The female nudity in movies is always sexualized.
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Making my family laugh when I was little - it became an addiction. It was a kind of survival.
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If you quit being cunty, the whole world will stop being against you.
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You have to be able to laugh at yourself. That's what I tell Asian people all the time.
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Men like to squash you. I just want someone who's happy with himself, happy with his life. He doesn't have to squash mine.
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I never want to be in a position where I have to defend my material. It's too subjective. It's for other people to defend or not defend.
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Sometimes I am screwing around, and sometimes I get way too serious, but I am a pretty sincere person.
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We need to stop telling girls they can be anything they want when they grow up. Because it would have never occurred to them that they couldn't.
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I was sent to sleepover camp since I was 6, and you know, it's a recipe for disaster.
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I've never had an abortion. And I don't know if I would. But, it doesn't mean that I wouldn't fight to the death for women to make their own choices for their own human bodies.
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I looked up and saw the shape of a heart made by the silhouette of Ben Affleck and Matt Damon kissing.
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I do love the idea of ritual.
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Mommy is one of the chosen people … and daddy believes that Jesus is magic!
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