Quote

Don't tell girls they can be anything they want when they grow up. Because it would have never occurred to them that they couldn't. It's like saying, 'Hey, when you get in the shower, I'm not gonna read your diary.' 'Wait--are you gonna read my diary?' 'No! I said I'm not gonna read your diary. Go take a shower!'

Sarah Silverman

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Sarah Silverman
Age: 53
Born: 1970
Born: December 1
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Guitarist
Screenwriter
Singer
Television Actor
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Bedford
New Hampshire
Sarah Kate Silverman
Take
Grow
Diaries
Never
Saying
Showers
Would
Grows
Occurred
Like
Waiting
Hey
Read
Gonna
Girl
Wait
Tell
Girls
Diary
Anything
Couldn
Shower

More quotes by Sarah Silverman

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My mom was always someone who if, even now, I say I met a certain famous person, she always says, She's married to so and so!
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Why would I become involved with something that doesn't include everyone? If you're getting married today, it's the equivalent of joining a country club that doesn't allow blacks or Jews.
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If I have kids, I'll adopt.
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I learned pretty early is I never defend my material it's for other people to if someone is offended. It's so subjective, and if you don't find it funny, it's definitely going to be offensive.
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I was a bedwetter until I was about 15, and it was humiliating.
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When I was 17, I read a profile of Carol Leifer. Since then, I wanted to be her. I still want to be her.
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If you take a shower with your boyfriend, I guarantee by the time you step out of that shower, your breasts will be sparkling clean.
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Drew Friedman isn't just a brilliant artist. He takes you to a place. He takes you back in time. He makes you smell the stale cigarettes and cold brisket and you say, thank you for the pleasure.
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Mommy is one of the chosen people … and daddy believes that Jesus is magic!
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Everybody blames the Jews for killing Christ, and the Jews try to pass it off on the Romans. I'm one of the few people who believes it was the blacks.
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Scientology is weird because it's new.
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Your inability to see yourself clearly is what's keeping you alive.
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Don’t forget, God can see you masturbating. But don’t stop. He’s almost there.
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If I have to write by a certain time, I can pull through, but usually I just let stuff happen, hanging out with comic friends - or bringing a basic idea on stage and seeing if it goes anywhere.
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I love making videos on my couch. You can put those on the Internet fast. I can express myself.
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Sometimes I am screwing around, and sometimes I get way too serious, but I am a pretty sincere person.
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That's not to say that I don't find anything offensive.
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I’ve always had dreams. When I was little, I’d go to sleep with my head on my hands, which were in fists like I was looking through a camera. I felt like sleep was the movies - just drifting off to the movies.
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It shows the truth - that the real meaning of a word is only as powerful or harmless as the emotion behind it.
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If you sell the Vatican and you take that money and you use it to feed every single human being on the planet, you will get cah-azy pussy. All the pussy. I don't mean literally. That might not be your cup of tea. I don't know what your version of 'all the pussy' is. But you'll get all the pussy.
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