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Don’t forget, God can see you masturbating. But don’t stop. He’s almost there.

Sarah Silverman

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Sarah Silverman
Age: 53
Born: 1970
Born: December 1
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Guitarist
Screenwriter
Singer
Television Actor
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Bedford
New Hampshire
Sarah Kate Silverman
Masturbating
Stop
Almost
Forget

More quotes by Sarah Silverman

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There are so many great comedies, right now. I like how comedies are really mixing. They're not just one thing. It can be very moving and dramatic, and yet hilarious.
Sarah Silverman
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Well, I'm not afraid to say something if I think it's funny, even if it's harsh or racist.
Sarah Silverman
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Mommy is one of the chosen people … and daddy believes that Jesus is magic!
Sarah Silverman
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I was a bedwetter until I was about 15, and it was humiliating.
Sarah Silverman
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I can't wait till Sunday, I'm gonna see my favorite niece and my other niece.
Sarah Silverman
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I mean, I talk about being Jewish a lot. It's funny because I do think of myself as Jewish ethnically, but I'm not religious at all. I have no religion.
Sarah Silverman
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You have to take the chance to bomb and disappoint audiences.
Sarah Silverman
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Strippers should be role-models for little girls. If only for the fact that they wax their assholes.
Sarah Silverman
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People who follow their religion to the letter of the law are just silly. I mean, I want to tell Hasidic Jews I promise you, God will not mind if you wear a nice cotton blend in the summer.
Sarah Silverman
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I don't need a lot of space.
Sarah Silverman
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Some people say my humor focuses too much on stereotypes. It doesn't. It focuses on facts.
Sarah Silverman
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I don't wanna be labeled as straight or labeled as gay. I just want people to look at me and see me as white.
Sarah Silverman
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Look at the people who are kind of the funniest cultures, they're the cultures of the people who have been the most oppressed, black people and Jews. Not that they're the only funny people, but culturally, it comes from the pain, you know?
Sarah Silverman
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Your inability to see yourself clearly is what's keeping you alive.
Sarah Silverman
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I was Minnie Mouse for Halloween, every year when I was little. Then, I had the Cinderella nightgown, when I was really little, that I begged my mother to wear to school. I was also Snow White a lot.
Sarah Silverman
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What makes Disney movies and Pixar movies always so good, hey take time and they're constantly honing, and tweaking, and rejiggering things, and taking influences from every cog, including myself, that can help. Any place where there can be inspiration. They make every moment very layered and very rich.
Sarah Silverman
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I remember the horror story that I told myself over and over again. I'm totally alone in my body. I'm totally alone in my head and nobody will ever see through my eyes. I'm just completely alone.
Sarah Silverman
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I don't care if you think I'm racist. I just want you to think I'm thin.
Sarah Silverman
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I feel so confident and awesome and sexy when I'm with people who are older than me, and I've always been surrounded by people who are older than me. But to be vital in comedy, you have to exist in a world that's dominated by young people.
Sarah Silverman
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It feels weird in our ear holes to hear people worshipping a guy named Ron. We know Rons in our life.
Sarah Silverman