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Mommy is one of the chosen people … and daddy believes that Jesus is magic!
Sarah Silverman
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Sarah Silverman
Age: 53
Born: 1970
Born: December 1
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Guitarist
Screenwriter
Singer
Television Actor
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Bedford
New Hampshire
Sarah Kate Silverman
Mommy
Daddy
Believes
Chosen
Magic
Jesus
Believe
People
More quotes by Sarah Silverman
I'd love to do drama if it was interesting.
Sarah Silverman
The good news is hopeful doesn't mean dumb. The bad news is cynical doesn't mean smart.
Sarah Silverman
I just think of myself as a comedian, really.
Sarah Silverman
Jews, black people - any people who are hated or who have suffered, either as individuals or as a people - use humour. It is a survival skill.
Sarah Silverman
I mean, I love being with friends and I love kissing and loving someone to pieces. But it's hard to find someone who doesn't ultimately start judging you and your choices.
Sarah Silverman
I'm so glad Courtney Love is here I left my crack in my other purse.
Sarah Silverman
Don't tell girls they can be anything they want when they grow up. Because it would have never occurred to them that they couldn't. It's like saying, 'Hey, when you get in the shower, I'm not gonna read your diary.' 'Wait--are you gonna read my diary?' 'No! I said I'm not gonna read your diary. Go take a shower!'
Sarah Silverman
I learned pretty early is I never defend my material it's for other people to if someone is offended. It's so subjective, and if you don't find it funny, it's definitely going to be offensive.
Sarah Silverman
Scientology is weird because it's new.
Sarah Silverman
I'm Jewish, but I'm totally not.
Sarah Silverman
If I have kids, I'll adopt.
Sarah Silverman
I do love poop. I can't help it. The heart wants what it wants. I enjoy being clever and pithy and political, but nothing's going to get me like dumb stuff.
Sarah Silverman
I think the difference between being miserable and finding happiness is just a matter of perspective. If you live your life defining yourself by what other people think of you, it's a form of self-torture.
Sarah Silverman
I don't get this shitty attitude that only gays should care about gay issues and only women should care about women's issues.
Sarah Silverman
Don’t forget, God can see you masturbating. But don’t stop. He’s almost there.
Sarah Silverman
I'm lucky because I intentionally keep my overhead low, and so I can say, No, thank you.
Sarah Silverman
The female nudity in movies is always sexualized.
Sarah Silverman
It's funny how people will think I'm being sarcastic a lot and joking. So I'll say, I like your dress, and they'll go (bleep) you! Or I say something serious and they go, Oh, yeah, ha-ha. They're strangers. They're people who know me from comedy, but luckily I am on pretty much all the time!
Sarah Silverman
I think fake boobs have done great things for real boobs. I think people finally appreciate real boobs. People like real boobs. I do. I also enjoy the fact that they are life-nourishers.
Sarah Silverman
Well, I'm not afraid to say something if I think it's funny, even if it's harsh or racist.
Sarah Silverman
