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If I have kids, I'll adopt.
Sarah Silverman
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Sarah Silverman
Age: 53
Born: 1970
Born: December 1
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Guitarist
Screenwriter
Singer
Television Actor
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Bedford
New Hampshire
Sarah Kate Silverman
Adopt
Kids
More quotes by Sarah Silverman
People who like what I do come in all shapes and sizes. Not sure what the common denominator is per se. Oh, it's meeee! But to be embraced by a progressive community means something to me and this one feels like home.
Sarah Silverman
I learned that people in wheelchairs are allowed to have marathons … which, to me, seems like cheating, but what are you gonna say?
Sarah Silverman
I mean, I love being with friends and I love kissing and loving someone to pieces. But it's hard to find someone who doesn't ultimately start judging you and your choices.
Sarah Silverman
I still have highs and lows, maybe I don't cry salty tears as much.
Sarah Silverman
I just don't let that mentality be a part of my world.
Sarah Silverman
The good news is hopeful doesn't mean dumb. The bad news is cynical doesn't mean smart.
Sarah Silverman
I'll be back. I'll be black. I'll be white black.
Sarah Silverman
Don’t forget, God can see you masturbating. But don’t stop. He’s almost there.
Sarah Silverman
I'm lucky because I intentionally keep my overhead low, and so I can say, No, thank you.
Sarah Silverman
By the time I would have graduated, at 22, I was a writer and featured performer on Saturday Night Live.
Sarah Silverman
I became known for surprising audiences. Except now, if I surprise them every time, they expect that.
Sarah Silverman
I don't care if you think I'm racist. I just want you to think I'm thin.
Sarah Silverman
This is AIDS. AIDS is as real as an egg.
Sarah Silverman
Someone on Twitter sent me a page from a textbook. It had a picture of a football player next to a picture of me. The juxtaposition was meant to illustrate two meanings of offensive. Seriously. It broke my heart. It's that accepted what I do is offensive?
Sarah Silverman
I was Minnie Mouse for Halloween, every year when I was little. Then, I had the Cinderella nightgown, when I was really little, that I begged my mother to wear to school. I was also Snow White a lot.
Sarah Silverman
I didn't lose my virginity until I was twenty-six. Nineteen vaginally, but twenty-six what my boyfriend calls the real way.
Sarah Silverman
Jesus is magic, because he turned water into wine. I think he made the statue of liberty disappear in the 80s or something.
Sarah Silverman
People are always introducing me as Sarah Silverman, Jewish comedienne. I hate that! I wish people would see me for who I really am — I'm white!
Sarah Silverman
I like talking about things that are taboo, because it makes them not taboo anymore.
Sarah Silverman
That's not to say that I don't find anything offensive.
Sarah Silverman
