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I just think of myself as a comedian, really.
Sarah Silverman
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Sarah Silverman
Age: 53
Born: 1970
Born: December 1
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Guitarist
Screenwriter
Singer
Television Actor
Television Producer
Voice Actor
Bedford
New Hampshire
Sarah Kate Silverman
Thinking
Comedian
Really
Think
More quotes by Sarah Silverman
People say I'm a nice girl saying terrible things. I tend to say the opposite of what I think. You hope that the absolute power of that transcends, and reaches the audience.
Sarah Silverman
When I was 17, I read a profile of Carol Leifer. Since then, I wanted to be her. I still want to be her.
Sarah Silverman
I was a bedwetter until I was about 15, and it was humiliating.
Sarah Silverman
I mean, I talk about being Jewish a lot. It's funny because I do think of myself as Jewish ethnically, but I'm not religious at all. I have no religion.
Sarah Silverman
I like trying jokes and seeing the response, and if I end up doing it in my act, it won't be 140 characters. Twitter is helpful that way to me. It's like a message in a bottle. But a lot of times I think I tweet the stuff I would like to say to teenage me.
Sarah Silverman
I buy water at the liquor store across the street from where I live. So I'm walking into the door, and standing, loitering, outside the door is a man. And I walk by him to go in, and he says, I want pussy! Now, I don't want to seem conceited or anything, but he was talking about me!
Sarah Silverman
Men like to squash you. I just want someone who's happy with himself, happy with his life. He doesn't have to squash mine.
Sarah Silverman
The audience works as such a mob. They either all laugh or all don't laugh, and, you know, changes from audience to audience.
Sarah Silverman
Being with friends felt like a burden. I remember just sobbing.
Sarah Silverman
If you sell the Vatican and you take that money and you use it to feed every single human being on the planet, you will get cah-azy pussy. All the pussy. I don't mean literally. That might not be your cup of tea. I don't know what your version of 'all the pussy' is. But you'll get all the pussy.
Sarah Silverman
I was raped by a doctor. Which is, you know, so bittersweet for a Jewish girl.
Sarah Silverman
Like I said about Seinfeld and Chris Rock, they're a great combination of brilliance and hard work. [But] there are people who are brilliant and don't work hard, and there are people who are brilliant and sabotage themselves.
Sarah Silverman
I've never had an abortion. And I don't know if I would. But, it doesn't mean that I wouldn't fight to the death for women to make their own choices for their own human bodies.
Sarah Silverman
Someone on Twitter sent me a page from a textbook. It had a picture of a football player next to a picture of me. The juxtaposition was meant to illustrate two meanings of offensive. Seriously. It broke my heart. It's that accepted what I do is offensive?
Sarah Silverman
Don’t forget, God can see you masturbating. But don’t stop. He’s almost there.
Sarah Silverman
I'm lucky because I intentionally keep my overhead low, and so I can say, No, thank you.
Sarah Silverman
I'm always in those tabloids where they show who's badly dressed. It's funny, because each time I'm getting my picture taken, I'm thinking, This is a nice outfit.
Sarah Silverman
Look at the people who are kind of the funniest cultures, they're the cultures of the people who have been the most oppressed, black people and Jews. Not that they're the only funny people, but culturally, it comes from the pain, you know?
Sarah Silverman
You have to be able to laugh at yourself. That's what I tell Asian people all the time.
Sarah Silverman
Mommy is one of the chosen people … and daddy believes that Jesus is magic!
Sarah Silverman
