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That first love. And the first one who breaks your heart. For me, they just happen to be the same person.
Sarah Dessen
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Sarah Dessen
Age: 54
Born: 1970
Born: June 6
Novelist
Writer
Evanston
Illinois
Firsts
First
Heart
Breaks
Love
Happen
Break
Happens
Persons
Person
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My sister, who never understood most of the things I wanted her to, might have been able to understand what had happened to me in this summer of weddings and beginnings. And she was right. The first boy was always the hardest.
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All you could do was take on as much weight as you can bear. And if you're lucky, there's someone close enough by to shoulder the rest.
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I told you, everyone understands a quest.
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It's not always easy being her daughter.' I think,' she said, 'sometimes it's hard no matter whose daughter you are.
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In school, writing was the only thing that really came naturally to me, but it wasn't until college that I realized that I could do it for more than just fun.
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It's all about you, Colie. She touched one finger to her temple, tap tap tap. Believe in yourself up here and it will make you stronger than you could ever imagine. There is something infectious about confidence. And for that one moment, with my eyebrows burning and my eyes watering, I believed. And good hair never hurt either.
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Together, we looked down at the tiny house, the sole thing on this vast, flat surface. Like the only person living on the moon. It could be either lonely or peaceful, depending on how you looked at it. It's a start, I said.
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In the end, though, maybe it's not how you reach a place that matters. Just that you get there at all.
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Never would forever, with all its meanings, be so clear and distinct as in the true, guaranteed end of the world.
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Two a.m.' He swallowed, then said, You know. The person you can call at two a.m. and, no matter what, you can count on them. Even if they're asleep or it's cold or you need to be bailed out of jail...they'll come for you. It's like, the highest level of friendship.
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Each time, I think I'm never going to write another book. It never gets easier.
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Here was a boy who liked flaws, who saw them not as failings but as strengths. Who knew such a person could exist, or what would have happened if we'd found each other under different circumstances? Maybe in a perfect world. But not in this one.
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In those first few hours officially single again the world seems like it expands, suddenly bigger and more vast now that you have to get through it alone.
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You can't love anyone that way more than once in a lifetime. It's too hard and it hurts too much when it ends. The first boy is always the hardest to get over, Haven. It's just the way the world works.
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I should have told you from the start. I will let you down.
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There's a kind of radar that you get, after years of being talked about and made fun of by other people. You can almost smell it when it's about to happen, can recognize instantly the sound of a hushed voice, lowered just enough to make whatever is said okay. I had only been in Colby for a few weeks. But I had not forgotten.
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Maybe other writers have perfect first drafts, but I am not one of them. I always try to get the book as tight as I can, but you reach a point as the author where you have lost all perspective.
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You're not the kind of person who smiles for nothing, Colie. I have to earn every one.
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Of course it hurts, she grumbled, tipping my head further back. Life sucks. Get over it
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Some things don't last forever, but some things do. Like a good song, or a good book, or a good memory you can take out and unfold in your darkest times, pressing down on the corners and peering in close, hoping you still recognize the person you see there.
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