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How it seemed like you could see everything, but certain things were blocked out, hidden.

Sarah Dessen

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Sarah Dessen
Age: 54
Born: 1970
Born: June 6
Novelist
Writer
Evanston
Illinois
Certain
Everything
Things
Like
Blocked
Hidden
Seemed

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I think having a good agent is key. I've been with mine for ten years now, and she's very honest with me. There are a lot of times I've sent her books that were not so good because I was tired of writing, or panicked about money, and she's told me flat out, You don't want this to be your next book. Trust me.
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Because this is what happens when you try to run from the past. It just doesn’t catch up, it overtakes … blotting out the future.
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Like it takes so little not only to change something, but to make you forget the way it once was, as well.
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There's just something obvious about emptiness, even when you try to convince yourself otherwise.
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I wasn’t ready to think about the other yet: that it wasn’t that I wasn’t right for Macon, but that maybe he wasn’t right for me. There was a difference. Even for someone who things didn’t come easy for, someone like me.
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The worst part was that I had things I wanted to tell my mother, too many to count, but none of them would go down so easy. She'd been through too much, between my siters-I could not add to the weight. So instead, I did my best to balance it out, bit by bit, word by word, story by story, even if none of them were true.
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Not for the first time, I wished both of us could just say what we meant. But that, like so much else, was impossible
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closed my eyes and listened. It was like music I'd heard all my life, even more than This Lullaby. All those keystrokes, all those letters, so many words. I brushed my fingers over the beads and watched as her image rippled, like it was on water, breaking apart gently and shimmering before becoming whole again.
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The way I see it, she continued, is that some things are just meant to be the way they are.
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The past did affect the present and the future, in ways you could see and a million ones you couldn't. Time wasn't a thing you could divide easily there was no defined middle or beginning or end. I could pretend to leave the past behind, but it would not leave me.
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Please. She sighed. 'Can't a girl have high standards? I don't want an ordinary boy.
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I wondered again why the right thing always seemed to be met with so much resistance, when you'd think it would be the easier path. You had to fight to be virtuous.
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Even if you couldn't see it beneath the surface, molecules were bonding, energy pushing up slowly, as something worked do hare, all alone to grow.
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Some things are meant to be broken. Imperfect. Chaotic.
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When you can't save yourself or your heart, it helps to be able to save face.
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There was something so heavy about the burden of history, of the past. I wasn't sure I had it in me to keep looking back.
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