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I didn't want to talk about what happened, so it seemed safest not to talk at all.

Sarah Dessen

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Sarah Dessen
Age: 54
Born: 1970
Born: June 6
Novelist
Writer
Evanston
Illinois
Didn
Safest
Seemed
Happened
Talk

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A thump thump thump noise that was so unfamiliar, and yet I couldn't quite place it. But I knew it. It was - Mmm-hmmm, Monica murmured, just as Wes came view into the path. He was running, his pace quick and steady. He was in shorts, his shirt off, staring ahead as he passed. His back was tan and gleaming with sweat.
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I wondered again why the right thing always seemed to be met with so much resistance, when you'd think it would be the easier path. You had to fight to be virtuous.
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And to know me, as you have discovered, is to love me.
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You get what you give, but also what you're willing to take.
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But all the love in the world won't save a sinking ship. You have to either bail or jump overboard.
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There's just something obvious about emptiness, even when you try to convince yourself otherwise.
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The way I see it, she continued, is that some things are just meant to be the way they are.
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I've always known who I am. I might not work perfectly, or be like them, but that's okay. I know I work in my own way.
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Family isnt about blood relationships, its about the meaning behind them. I relize now that sharing chromosoms is not the only way to having a family, its about the friendship behind it.
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Because this is what happens when you try to run from the past. It just doesn’t catch up, it overtakes … blotting out the future.
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From up above, in a plane passing over, you’d just see one little light in all this dark, with no idea of the lives that were being lived within it, and in the house beside, and beside that one. So much happening in the world, night and day, hour by hour. It was no wonder we were meant to sleep, if only to check out of it for a little while.
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The truth about forever is that it is happening right now.
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We all have one idea of what the color blue is, but pressed to describe it specifically, there are so many ways: the ocean, lapis lazuli, the sky, someone's eyes. Our definitions are as different as we are ourselves.
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It was like discovering that some part of you wasn't yours at all. And it made me wonder what else I couldn't claim.
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I was born in 1970 in Illinois, but all the life I remember I've spent in Chapel Hill, N.C.
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So I left him there alone to watch history repeat the same events retold again and again on his own.
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I waited. Because with Eli, he was never trying to get you to finish for him. He always knew where he was going, even if it took a little while to get there.
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That first love. And the first one who breaks your heart. For me, they just happen to be the same person.
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