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Not for the first time, I wished both of us could just say what we meant. But that, like so much else, was impossible
Sarah Dessen
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Sarah Dessen
Age: 54
Born: 1970
Born: June 6
Novelist
Writer
Evanston
Illinois
Firsts
First
Much
Time
Wished
Like
Meant
Impossible
Else
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The worst thing you can do if you miss or need someone is let them know it.
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If you didn't love him, this never would have happened. But you did. And accepting that love and everything that followed it is part of letting it go.
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I'd seen another shade of him, and if it had been light where we were now, he'd have seen the same of me. So I was grateful, as I had been so often in my life, for the dark.
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But all the love in the world won't save a sinking ship. You have to either bail or jump overboard.
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Whenever something great happens, you’re always kind of poised for the universe to correct itself.
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It all depends on how you choose to live it. It's like forever, always changing.
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Being brave and self-confident doesn't necessarily start inside...It starts with the rest of the world, and it leads back to you.
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I thought of all the times we'd been together, how I kept coming closer, then retreating, while he stayed right where he was. A constant in a world where few, if any, really existed.
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But I think, personally, that it would be worse to have been alone all that time. Sure, maybe I would have protected my heart from some things, but would that really have been better? To hold myself apart because I was too scared that something might no be forever?
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“In Truth,” I said, “there are no rules other than you have to tell the truth.” “How do you win?” he asked. “That,” I said, “is such a boy question.
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But anyone can begin. It was the part with all the promise, the potential, the things I loved. More and more, though, I was finding myself wanting to find out what happened in the end.
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You own a Tic Tac. Gum is just borrowed. - Esther
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You can't love anyone that way more than once in a lifetime. It's too hard and it hurts too much when it ends.
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When you can't save yourself or your heart, it helps to be able to save face.
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Some things you don't have to tell. Some things, between sisters, are understood.
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It was so weird, because usually I was totally nervous talking to guys. But Eli was different. He made me want to say more, not less. Which was maybe not a good thing.
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But something, somehow, had made all these paths converge. You couldn't find it on a checklist, or work it into the equation. It just happened.
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The past did affect the present and the future, in ways you could see and a million ones you couldn't. Time wasn't a thing you could divide easily there was no defined middle or beginning or end. I could pretend to leave the past behind, but it would not leave me.
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It was like reaching for someone's hand, then missing their fingers, or even their arm, and hitting their shoulder instead. But no matter. You hang on tight anyway.
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And no relationship is perfect, ever. There are always some ways you have to bend, to compromise, to give something up in order to gain something greater.
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