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It's harder that in looks, I told him when I finally got back in the car. Most things are.
Sarah Dessen
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Sarah Dessen
Age: 54
Born: 1970
Born: June 6
Novelist
Writer
Evanston
Illinois
Finally
Car
Harder
Told
Back
Looks
Things
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She bought seeds and raided nurseries and mulched and composted and spent full days with her hands full of earth, coaxing life our of the dry, dull grass my father had spent years pushing a mower over.
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I didn't want to leave things the way we had, unresolved, ... and tried to tell myself he cared about me enough not to look elsewhere for what I wasn't giving him.
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It was as familiar to me as a song I'd been hearing my whole life, covered by various people but the basic tune the same.
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It was just perfect, just right all at once.
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She fell, she hurt, she felt. She lived. And for all the tumble of her experiences, she still had hope. Maybe this next time would do the trick. Or maybe not. But unless you stepped into the game, you would never know.
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As if it didnt matter what was on, but instead how hard i was listening.
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Odd how it was so easy for a stranger to assume such familiarity. Especially when those who were supposed to know you best often didn't, not at all.
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Home wasn't a set house, or a single town on a map. It was wherever the people who loved you were, whenever you were together.
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In school, writing was the only thing that really came naturally to me, but it wasn't until college that I realized that I could do it for more than just fun.
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The only thing I can't stand more than seeing something done wrong is seeing it done slowly.
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It all depends on how you choose to live it. It's like forever, always changing.
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But as i lay there, it only seemes like silence filling my ears. And the thing was, it was so freaking loud.
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The truth was, I wasn't sure. But I wanted to keep believing people could change, and it was certainly easier to do so when you were in the midst of it.
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That first love. And the first one who breaks your heart. For me, they just happen to be the same person.
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Harder to get in than out, like so little else.
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What you need, what you deserve, is a guy who adores you for what you are. Who doesn't see you as a project, but a prize. you know?
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Okay, he said. He took a breath. What would you do, if you could do anything? I took a step toward him, closing the space between us. This. I said. And then I kissed him.
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He was the closest thing I'd ever had to something, or someone, that mattered. But in the end, close didn't count. You were either in, or you weren't.
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But the bottom line is that, as humans, we are by nature selfish creatures. The only way we care about anything, really, is by making it about us.
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If this was my forever, I wouldn't want to spend it here.
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