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It doesn't matter, anyway, why you like me. Just that you do.

Sarah Dessen

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Sarah Dessen
Age: 54
Born: 1970
Born: June 6
Novelist
Writer
Evanston
Illinois
Anyway
Doesn
Matter
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I think if you're going to show a true representation of any one life, it can't be about any one thing. I try to see more of a full picture, with the romance just a single part.
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I honestly don't have many creative outlets. I'm not crafty - although motherhood has forced me to try to be - and I can only draw trees, beaches, and clouds. I'm a so-so cook except for deviled eggs. Writing has always been the one thing I feel that I am pretty good at doing. But it's enough, thank goodness.
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No one could tell you: you just had to go through it on your own. If you were lucky, you came out on the other side and understood. If you didn't, you kept getting thrust back, retracing those steps, until you finally got it right.
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I was so scared about being discovered, but nobody came. Nobody heard. In my own ears, though, my sobs sounded primal and scary, like something I would have turned off if I'd been able to.
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You just had to know where to look.
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Just me and the future, finally together. Now there was a happy ending I could believe in.
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When you've never gotten love from someone, you don't know what it might look like if it ever does appear. You look for it in everything: any bright light overhead could be a star.
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Because maybe, the best of times were yet to come. You never knew.
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Never would forever, with all its meanings, be so clear and distinct as in the true, guaranteed end of the world.
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When you have a kid, you sign on for the whole package: good, bad, everything in between. you can't just dip in and out, picking and choosing the parts you want and quitting when it's not perfect.
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Which is completely out-of-line behavior. Then you are wholly within your rights to stomp on their foot. No, Delia said, over her shoulder. Actually, you're not. Just excuse yourself as politely as possible, and get out of arm's reach. Kristy looked at me, shaking her head. Stomp them. she said, under her breath. Really.
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Once, I was easy. Now, I was choosy. See? Big difference.
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Because the truth sometimes hurts, I said. Yeah, he said. So do lies, though.
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Here was a boy who liked flaws, who saw them not as failings but as strengths. Who knew such a person could exist, or what would have happened if we'd found each other under different circumstances? Maybe in a perfect world. But not in this one.
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You can't love anyone that way more than once in a lifetime. It's too hard and it hurts too much when it ends. The first boy is always the hardest to get over, Haven. It's just the way the world works.
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I remembered Owen telling me how music had saved him in Phoenix, that it drowned everything out, and it was the same for me now. As long as I had something to listen to, I could blur the things I didn't want to think about, if not block them out completely.
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He doesn’t love me. He might still love me as I was at fifteen, when I didn’t know any better. When I trusted everyone. I’m not that person any more. He’s just a boy. He was the first to really hurt me, but he’s just a boy. There were a lot of them.
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That's the thing about someone who rarely gets upset: when they do, you notice.
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Writing a novel is like childbirth: once you realize how awful it really is, you never want to do it again.
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Then I'd crawl back into bed, smelling her all around me, and tell myself that next time, I would lock that window. But I never did.
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