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Sometimes I think if I had to choose between an ear of corn or making love to a woman, I'd choose the corn.

Sara Gruen

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Sara Gruen
Age: 55
Born: 1969
Born: January 1
Author
Novelist
Writer
Vancouver
British Columbia
Ears
Choose
Woman
Making
Sometimes
Love
Think
Thinking
Corn

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Must protect my little pockets of happiness.
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Being the survivor stinks.
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They grew fat and happy--the horses, not the children, or Marlena for that matter.
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I stroke her lightly, memorizing her body. I want her to melt into me, like butter on toast. I want to absorb her and walk around for the rest of my days with her encased in my skin. I lie motionless, savoring the feeling of her body against mine. I'm afraid to breathe in case I break the spell.
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I don't like outlining, because books are organic things. Sometimes a book doesn't want to be written in a certain way.
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But it all zipped by. One minute Marlena and I were up to our eyeballs, and the next thing we knew the kids were borrowing the car and fleeing the coop for college. And now, here I am. In my nineties and alone.
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I tend not to think about the reading public at all, or the business, when I'm writing.
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Even when I look straight into the milky blue eyes I can't find myself any more. When did I stop being me?
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You do right by me, I'll show you a life most suckers can't even dream of.
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I look after those who look after me. He smacks his lips, stares at me, and adds, I also look after those who don't. - Sara Gruen (Water for Elephants)
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I scan the room. Catherine is writing quickly, her light brown hair falling over her face. She is left-handed, and because she writes in pencil her left arm is silver from wrist to elbow.
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I am further back, surrounded on all sides by wailing men, their faces shiny with tears. Uncle Al promised three dollars and a bottle of Canadian whiskey to the man who puts on the best show. You've never seen such grief-- even the dogs were howling.
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Although, pretending not to notice is almost worse than noticing.
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He stares at me, and then leans back in his chair. He's ill, Jacob. I say nothing. He's a paragon schnitzophonic. He's what?! Paragon schnitzophonic, repeats Uncle Al. You mean paranoid schizophrenic? Sure. Whatever. But the bottom line is he's mad as a hatter.
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I have to convince myself that this is not a pointless life, even the body is telling me so.
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How is it that everyone on this train has so much alcohol? We always head to Canada at the beginning of the season, she says taking her seat again. Their laws are much more civilized. Cheers.
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...if you expect people to try to do things your way, you're going to have to give some hints as to what that way is.
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Even as your body betrays you, your mind denies it.
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Then I lie down on the horse blanket and drift into a dream about Marlena that will probably cost me my soul.
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When two people are meant to be together, they will be together. It's fate.
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