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The whole world is watching America, and America is watching TV.

Sam Levenson

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Sam Levenson
Age: 68 †
Born: 1911
Born: December 28
Died: 1980
Died: August 27
Humorist
Journalist
Writer
New York City
New York
Samuel Levenson
Watching
Funny
America
Whole
World

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The chaplain of the Senate does not pray for the Senate. He watches the Senate and prays for the country.
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Don't watch the clock do what it does. Keep going.
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It's a good thing that when God created the rainbow he didn't consult a decorator or he would still be picking colors.
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The American success formula is first to get a home of your own, then to get a car of your own so you don't have to stay in that home of your own.
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If you want to know how your girl will treat you after marriage, just listen to her talking to her little brother.
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Somewhere on this globe, every ten seconds, there is a woman giving birth to a child. She must be found and stopped.
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I'm going to stop putting things off, starting tomorrow!
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It would be useless to bomb Washington. If you destroy one building, they already have two other buildings completely staffed with people doing exactly the same thing.
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I'm gonna put all my money into taxes. They're sure to go up.
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You don't have to be in Who's Who to know what's what.
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The simplest toy, one which even the youngest child can operate, is called a grandparent.
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You must pay for your sins. If you have already paid, please ignore this notice.
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The reason grandparents and grandchildren get along so well is that they have a common enemy.
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Lead us not into temptation. Just tell us where it is we'll find it.
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Just try to be happy. Unhappiness starts with wanting to be happier.
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I admit that: my wife is outspoken, but by whom?
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When I came home and showed my mother my report card with a mark of 98 in arithmetic, she wanted to know who had gotten the other two points.
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Courage is walking naked through a cannibal village
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It's not the sugar that makes the tea sweet, but the stirring.
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It was on my fifth birthday that Papa put his hand on my shoulder and said, 'Remember, my son, if you ever need a helping hand, you'll find one at the end of your arm.'
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